What do you consider to be the difference between sexual attraction for someone, and brotherhood -- as in having a best friend that you just hang out with. I mean, how do you know for sure? And please don't say "You get hard for them" or something like that - A real genuine answer would be very helpful. Thanks!
A Best Friend is like having a Brother or Sister that you have chosen & is not related to you by birth & the difference is you probably spend more time with your best friend than you would with your sibling & sexual attraction for someone,is just that a sexual attraction, if you are asking can the feelings for your best friend become blurred & you start to feel attracted to them, then yes as you are not blood related & many a friendship between a Straight Guy & Straight Girl has developed into a relationship, if your best friend is Bi or Gay then maybe.
I am not sure how to respond, and I suspect most don't either; but I'll take a shot at it anyway: Although you sort of dismissed the potential for sexual arousal, it is an important element, but only one element, in the much more complex set of conditions that form attraction. The assumption that you are making here is that there is a clear boundary between sexual attraction and friendship, if you are gay, it is possible that there is no boundary. What happens next will then depend on the person you are with and what develops. I would see this as a dynamic process which is very much dependent on how you see yourself. I can tell you with some assurance that if you see yourself as gay, you will look at all your male relationships as potentially sexual. Perhaps that is a disturbing thought; I don't know, but it does put the onus on your relationship, not with some abstract "brother" but on your relationship with that one person. Hope this helps!
My best friend and and I know each other better than anyone. I love him, but in as you said, a brotherly way. Any thoughts I have getting intimate with him leave me feeling disgusted. I could never kiss him. That's gross to me. He's my brother. So I guess that's the answer. Would you kiss him/her? If not, then they're just your friend.
Lol @ the Jackie Chan...well I think it is him. Yes, that is exactly how I feel with my best friend..but with my co workers it is a different relationship somewhat. I don't want to have sex or anything, but there is that awkward attraction towards them..they are gay and open - but I am closeted and still figuring out, am I gay? Or is it just brotherly attraction\friendly joking going on.
To me sometimes it is difficult. It has happened to me that I am not attracted to a very close friend of mine the one day, then the next they start flirting with me for fun or becoming intimate and I start thinking about how nice it would be to be together with your best friend. I don't have any male friends from childhood though, and maybe that is what changes the dynamics. When you know someone before you become sexually aware, then you can see these people as part of family. If not, then some form of attraction can potentially always be created, but of course sometimes it does and sometimes it doesn't. Personally, I have a couple of friends I consider best friends and the idea of kissing them does not disgust me. But it does not give me a boner either. I just would like to have that sort of homoromantic intimacy with them, without the sexual part of it. It's a strange and kind of unnerving feeling sometimes, but it is there and I cannot deny it.
So what would your advice be if I wanted to go to a bar with my friends but I want to go to a gay bar..I am not out yet so..yeah please check my gay bar advice post.
