1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

I feel stupid

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by Ruby, Mar 29, 2013.

  1. Ruby

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Mar 28, 2013
    Messages:
    59
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Oklahoma
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    I feel really stupid because I've only just began putting real thought toward my gender because hey until I found this site last night I never really allowed myself to think about it, because I figure I would just suck it up and deal with being female. I could deal with that, sort of, just being female with overly masculine traits/tones/whatever sometimes, these things don't normally bother me overly much. The thing is today, I hate everything about being female and I don't know what to do. My hair looks too feminine, my breasts tick me off, my sister calling me sissy upset me. I just really, really want to be male today. I hate the clothing I'm wearing, I hate everything. These feelings just came out of no where when my sister called me 'sissy' I don't know what to do. I'm a home where no one knows that I might even want to pretend to be a guy and I don't know if I can handle it.

    I feel so messed up because these feelings just came out of no where and I don't know how to handle them. Normally when I do have issues like this I can be alone or something but I'm visiting family today so no matter how male I want to be today I can't, I have to be a girl and I don't want to be.
     
  2. June Cleaver

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2013
    Messages:
    1,267
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    United States of America
    I completely understand! I hate being in this male body, looking like a guy. Other guys see me in public and see a guy. When I am alone at home, I forget what I look like. I long for the big breasts and hourglass shape I would have had if I had got the right body. I look just like my mother, and she was a knock-out in her day. Men went nuts around her when I was a kid still. I have some of her ability to attract men thank God, but they always just want sex from me. I am not sure what we can do if anything to make life right. I feel like I am in pergatory in this body. I guess I am saying I feel your pain and wish I knew what to do.... June
     
  3. Oddish

    Oddish Guest

    (*hug*) Hang in there. I know it feels like shit to have to put on a mask in front your family, but remember that this only today. Perhaps consider getting a haircut, dressing more masculine to help yourself feel better?
     
  4. Alyssum

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Mar 28, 2013
    Messages:
    19
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    I'm guessing just letting yourself think about it is starting to let you see how uncomfortable it makes you.... It really sucks but you shouldn't repress it, you should accept your feelings for what they are so you can move forward. As for having to cope around family, I definitely understand that, and I'm sorry. :frowning2: I wish you luck though, don't let it drag you down and just get through it, it'll be fine.

    (*hug*)
     
  5. Ruby

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Mar 28, 2013
    Messages:
    59
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Oklahoma
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Thanks for the support guys it makes me feel a little better. I still just don't know what to do because I like to flip between genders so even though I want so badly to be male today, tomorrow I might feel more feminine and hate any drastic changes I've made. I hate it, it's so confusing.