ok so im still struggling to live full time as myself. it is quite easy to hide as a guy(not very well) to go out for cigs. still need to quit lol cuz i have to constantly clear my throat to speak in the pitches i aim for... so i been buying them by pack and trying to slow down. when i dress as a guy to go get cigs it really makes me feel like im letting myself down. But i now only spend what maybe an hr a week as a guy so im getting there.. anyways I GOT IN HOWARD BROWN!!! and if everything goes right my current HRT start date is May 29, three days after my bday.. :icon_bigg:icon_bigg:icon_bigg my savings is running out and i can only stay here till the end of april, im unsure what my plan is but i need to come up with something before im in the moment unprepared. i still stick with my attitude of i dont care if i lose everything to start over as myself. and my make up skills are getting there seriously i can finally do eyeliner in straight even lines lol i understand highlighting and foundation way better. so im having fun being myself for now and waiting. as comfortable as i am hiding in my lil home in my lil town; i need to get out and not be so isolated from the world. i need to be around good ppl, ppl i can relate, i need to love and be loved... sometimes ppl dont know if im mtf or ftm is that a bad thing? im like im transgender, and ppl think i was a woman pretending to be a guy the whole time they knew me(im like im flattered u already think im a woman)... lol well if u actually read me thanks and take care... ciao
