I just want the uncertainty to settle down, I really don't mind which way it goes (lesbian, bi or straight) The uncertainty is just getting to me. Facts: I am 18 and have only had one really big crush (I have never felt this strong about another person she is just perfect in every way) I've always been way overprotective of my best friend at the time - at age 13 I had a huge argument with a friend because I did not approve of her bf. the friendship ended and they immigrated. I've dreamed about straight relationships, but more in the sense of forming a perfect little family I've grown up in a conservative house and have only one openly gay friend I am always the last to notice a good looking guy and usually don't know what my friends see in him (I think I might have recently trained myself to notice guys just to fit in and follow the conversation - is that possible? or am I just finally "growing up") I am completely ok with the idea of being lesbian, I would love waking up in a woman's arms every morning, just sometimes I think: what if I am wrong? what if I am just afraid of men because of past experiences? Is there a way to be sure of your sexuality?
Time. Sometimes we need time for our doubting voices to quieten, especially if we have concerns over whether or not our preferences are shaped by bad experiences. Time can help settle our minds. Experience. Now, in no way is experience needed, but I find it can help quieten doubting thoughts when combined with time. Sometimes you need the experience to act as confirmation to what you know. Validation. Sometimes we need someone to listen to us and talk through everything, acting as a form of external confirmation that our sporadic doubts are nothing more than what ifs. Someone to talk to freely, who gives their view and comments on our doubts. Not always a help, but it can help some. Otherwise I really do not know. Doubt is a strange creature, even if you know it's ridiculous it creeps up and bites you.
Thanks FruitFly!! This sounds exactly like what I need... (and I wouldn't mind a bit of relatively innocent experience:icon_wink) I think I've been over thinking things the past week or so... Should probably just go out be myself and meet people - after all my sexuality is just a part of me.
Most people content themselves with the prescribed monogamous heterosexuality. If you want to be sure of 'your' sexuality, you must try all known forms of sexuality. :icon_wink Perhaps you should begin with women, because you definitely know that you like them.
