Okay, I'm pretty confused. I've always been taught by society "gay=wrong" and whenever I had a crush on a girl or even thought "hey she's attractive" I've tried to repress it. But whenever I have a crush on a boy, it's always very short-lived and I find I get uncomfortable when a guy flirts with me. And whenever I like a guy, he always ends up hurting me, one of my friends, or just saying something outirght awful that makes me think "Ugh..boys." (Example of something that a boy I used to like said that made me dislike him: sluts deserve to be raped, those little whores prancing around in miniskirts) I've always found boys/men to be annoying and many of my "crushes" on boys are cover-ups so people don't think I'm weird for not liking anyone. And lately, I've been wondering if I'm bi or a lesbian.. I've been exposed to straight porn before, it doesn't really turn me on.... I've also been exposed to lesbian porn, and I found I was more turned on. I fantasize about being in a relationship with another girl, and I find myself more emotionally attracted to girls. I think on an emotional level, I could connect more successfully with a girl, and boys just get on my nerves in that aspect. Straight sex is sort of...ehhh, I guess.... but lesbian sex sounds a bit more appealing. I can see being married to a woman, and I'm fine with the idea of being bi or les. However, I haven't many crushes on girls, because if I know a girl is straight I won't even think about it and I'll try really hard to stop any "feelings" for her from getting past the early stages. But there's a girl in my class who I'm pretty sure is a lesbian... I think I like her, this time I didn't try as hard to stop my feelings... But I'm not going to let it get out of hand until it's confirmed that she's les or bi. Anyway, the whole reason I'm not sure is because I don't find guys all that nice or attractive, but I've had crushes on them in the past before. In the last month I've told my close friends about my concerns, they've all been very supportive. But they all don't know much about this sort of thing, and I think it makes them uncomfortable and I don't want to lose any friends. AND THERE IS NO WAY IN HECK I'M TELLING MY PARENTS UNTIL I'M TOTALLY SURE OF MY ORIENTATION. So I'm left with no one to express my worries about my sexuality to. Help? Please?:icon_sad:
Hey there, sweetie I've been through all this before. How similar our situations are is actually pretty creepy! But it's been a couple of years and guess what? The age-old Disney adage works pretty great. "Follow your heart." As far as I know, sexuality is fluid, you love who you love, find pretty who you do, whatever gets your motors roaring. (I am way too sorry for that metaphor, omg.) And if it's the ladies, great for you! You are who you are, and if you feel the need to identify, that's fine as well (In real life, I identify as "I, uh, I really like girls and you know, I like to kiss them and stuff and stuff" but there are those certain people I just have to go "Biatch, I'm gay.", so...) You have your own truth! You have plenty of time to uncover that, though. Try not to stress As for the girl in your class...I haven't had the best luck with girls so I'll try really hard not to jinx you with my advice but all I can say is good luck to you! And if you need anyone to talk to, I'm right here. (Like I said, I've been there, done that, broke a heart, got a T-shirt.)
Thank you for the advice. I really appreciate it. Oh, and I'd say I would be one of those people who would feel the need to identify. Especially because I want to come out to my parents soon and I think they'd understand it better if I could give the one orientation.
Ah, I see. Well, I identify myself as a lesbian because I do see myself comfortably being in a relationship with exclusively women and well, I find them super duper great. Those could be factors, you know? If you find yourself comfortable in a relationship with one sex or the other. You know yourself better than I do, dear, so I really think you're the only one who gets to decide on that. Right now, I can say that maybe you are bisexual, with a preference towards girls, as of late. Really teetering towards lesbian. But that's just one girl's point of view. This is your sexuality. Remember, honey, there's no pressure in coming out! Good luck to you!
