Am I faking this???

Maybe, but a lot of us felt the same way at first. We were worried that we might be fakers. Maybe you just need some time to ruminate about it. Eventually the empirical evidence you gather as you think it over will come to far outweigh the doubts that plague you.

 

I keep finding myself questioning the fact of if I'm "faking it" or not. I mean, I've always found lesbian porn to be more, I guess, pleasing than straight porn. And I can't picture myself having sex with a guy. But then I'll see an attractive boy and think, "Oh man, I really want to date him. He is sooooo cute."

So of course, I'll think it's just a phase and that I'm not truly gay. and your situation seems to be very much similar and the only advice I can truly give is that deep down, you know.

Can you picture yourself with a guy? Can you picture yourself with a girl? Which makes you happiest? If you were faking it, then I think you would know.

 

You can't exactly "fake" attraction, you're either attracted or you're not. Your other friends are probably either homophobic, or highly misinformed.

As far as I'm concerned, based on what you've written, you seem to be bisexual leaning towards males (due to your romantic fantasies of being with guys). Nothing wrong with that, and sexuality isn't a "phase" either.

 

You'll probably need a little more time to figure this out, but dude, you ARE NOT faking this. This isn't something people FAKE. People may get confused, dubious, doubtful, curious, but they don't fake this stuff, so don't listen to the people who're saying you just want attention.

With that being said, it's been three years since I came out to my first person, and sicne then, i've come out to my immediate family, all my friends, and the whole school, and even now, I sometimes wonder if I'm wrong and I'm not really gay. (But then usually I see a really cute guy and it reassures me like THAT).

So basically, just give it a little bit mroe time okay

 

Let me put it this way: How exactly would you fake being attracted to someone? What's the difference between the attraction you feel when you "think" you're faking it, and when you think it's real?

Sexual or Emotional attraction isn't something you can fake. You're still struggling with your sexuality, and as a result you're denying the existence of your attraction and trying to lie yourself into believe that it's "fake", when it's not. Attraction is always real, and you'll have to learn to accept that you can be attracted to males. Don't let those fools claiming that you're doing this just for the attention or faking it put you down, they are ignorant.

 

You can. That's called moving on with your life.

It's a lot easier to cut off someone if you don't have any particular relationship with the person. So if it's just a guy you've been admiring from afar, losing the attraction quickly upon realizing that it can't work isn't necessarily something difficult (could be for some people I suppose). It's a lot harder if the person you're attracted to is a close friend however.

 

Well, I'd say it's not just a matter of moving on with your life. It's also possible that you unconsciously found it unacceptable to be attracted to him when you discovered he wasn't gay.

I have always only been attracted to guys I knew were gay. I have never felt anything for straight men.

 

And?

You've just said you were not attracted to him. Just because someone comes out as gay doesn't mean you'll automatically become attracted to them. If that was the case it wouldn't be so hard to find a lover. :lol:

 

It's not exactly abnormal if you're thinking strictly in a sexual context. You don't exactly need to be attracted to be aroused.

 

Okay, on a similar note, what if your attraction has increased very dramatically since thinking that I might be gay. I mean, before it was kinda small and didnt really notice it, but it is the opposite now

 

Completely normal. You're acknowledging aspects of yourself you previously may not have known about or had to keep at a distance.

 

I've done (and do) this all the time. If I know a guy is straight, or even just choose to sort of mentally classify a guy as 'straight until proven otherwise', then its like my libido files them in the same drawer with women. Frankly, I've always considered this ability a feature rather than a bug. The more so after reading on EC how many guys struggle with nudity and locker room issues. Spent a good bit of time in locker rooms in college and never even considered the idea that I might get turned on by all the naked guys.

A big part of attraction and sexuality is mental and the most important sex organ you've got is the one between your ears.

Todd