1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Bi-curious?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by saberoffate, Jun 9, 2013.

  1. saberoffate

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2013
    Messages:
    3
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    FL
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    All but family
    Ok, so I've been really confused for a long time as to my sexual orientation and I've kind of ended at bi-curious? I've always thought of myself as a straight girl. But lately I've been thinking these weird late-night thoughts about hooking up with one of my friends. I've already sort of experimented with her once (we only kissed), but before I did I was so afraid and nerve-wracked my knees were literally SHAKING. When I experimented with her, I didn't really feel much of anything, just that nerve-wracking fear of "what if this" or "what if that". In the end, I didn't get much of my experiment and things have been super awkward with her afterward. I'd like to experiment again, but I don't really have anyone I could trust. I've considered asking a few of my bisexual friends, but I feel like thins would be awkward. Am I bisexual, bi-curious, lesbian or what? Or is this just a phase that comes with raging teenage hormones? Please help! (Also, if I do turn out to be bi, how would I come out to my folks? I'm a very strong Christian, but I've never judged anyone and have always been very supportive of my gay friends. My parents? Not so much. They're more the Bible-thumping, Leviticus kind of Christians, so I don't think they'd respond well to their precious daughter coming out as a bisexual (they do not believe in bisexuality, by the way, to them you're either gay or you're not)):help:
     
  2. FemCasanova

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 6, 2012
    Messages:
    1,113
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Oslo
    Welcome to EC! The forum of the brave :wink:

    Bi-curious is a charming label, in my opinion. It`s a great first step towards figuring things out. I used to think I was just a little bi-flexible, another label that I for some reason find incredibly charming. And don`t listen to your parents, just because bisexuality is invalidated by a lot of straight people with strong opinions, doesn`t mean it should be. Bisexuality is just as valid as every other letter in LGBT. You could be bisexual, you could be a lesbian. Some people know early and clearly, some of us require a little time and experience before we figure it out.

    I am not sure if experimenting with a bisexual friend is the best way to do it, but that completely depends on the person. I kissed a lot of my friends when I was between 16-18, and it was never a problem. Mostly though because at that time, in that community, people weren`t as aware of LGBT and didn`t put much into it. It`s hard to explain, but it was like a girl`s party thing. Everybody fooled around a bit, it was considered "cool" at the time. So, it wasn`t a big deal. Nobody worried about "If my friend kisses me and she then falls in love with me, it`s going to be a problem". At least not in the circles I ventured when I was a teen. So, if you have a chill, bisexual friend, who is pretty relaxed with kissing and fooling around, it might not be a problem or awkward at all. Thing is, if you do like it, and then start liking her that way, or the other way around, then you just have to be prepared that it could get a bit complicated. Doesn`t have to be, but could. If the thought isn`t too scary, you could try that. I wouldn`t advise you to do it with your best friend, but if it`s someone you know, but whose friendship is less crucial to you so that the risk is worth taking, then it`s an option :slight_smile:

    Are there any LGBT centers, school clubs, or similar in your local community where you could get to know some new people as well? Possibly even someone who like you are in the questioning/bi-curious phase? Some of us require that we fall a bit for someone before we react to them sexually, so it`s not always a given when we test it with someone we`re not romantically into.

    But again, welcome to EC and sorry for the delayed reply.
     
  3. saberoffate

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2013
    Messages:
    3
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    FL
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    All but family
    Thanks so much for the welcome as well as the advice :slight_smile: Something I forgot to mention about myself is that I am thirteen so the new hormones might be playing a part in all of this, but I'm still quite confused. I don't exactly have anyone I could talk to about this, including any clubs or LGBT centers in my area, which is what made me to turn to EC. I just really didn't know where else to go. I doubt I'm lesbian since I am still attracted to men, both sexually and emotionally. I'm only slightly attracted to girls on a sexual level, I can't imagine myself dating a girl and much less in bed with one but since I've already kissed a few girls I guess I can imagine myself doing that. I really REALLY want men on both levels, but the weird thing is, I've kinda always wanted to be on top. The only way to describe it would be "gay man trapped in a woman's body" I guess? If you can understand what I'm talking about here, I guess I've always wanted to be the seme in a yaoi relationship? Like, I can totally see myself in bed with a guy, but I figure the guy would be the one wearing some sexy costume (like a maid outfit or a bunny girl outfit... *¬*) What the hell is wrong with me....damn, I have some weird fetishes....Anyway, thanks so much. Still need an answer on that slight attraction to girls, but if you can, I'd also like an answer as to the other thing. Please and thank you! XD (Damn...that was long...SORRY! XD)