Alright so the question isn't whether or not I'm gay, I know that much, what I'm looking for is an explination for why I can be super attracted to girls physically and sexually but I can see myself more long term with a guy even though I just find the whole concept of sex with a guy awkward. (Sorry dudes) What I was theorizing was that because I have assumed for so long that I am straight I have never had the chance to actually conceptualize being with another woman so its just taking some time for my brain to fully adjust to the way it is now thinking. My other theory was that I have been so indoctrinated by media about hetrosexuality that it has trained my brain to think that way and so again it it just taking time for my brain to fully adjust. Any imput is appreciated and looked at! ^.^ :icon_wink feel free to let me know if I am completely wrong! I won't be offended! :lol: Thank you (!)
Hmmm... There is labels/suggestions that allow you to seperate sexual feelings from romantic feelings. For example, you seem like a homosexual heteromantic. You find girls sexually attractive, but guys emotionally/romantically attractive. The term heteromantic is typically used with asexualilty, but I have seen it combined with sexual labels to create an explanation.
Yeah, I had the same thing for a long time. I couldn't even imagine having sex with a woman, but couldn't imagine having a proper relationship with a man. That changed. I don't know exactly when, but now I can't imagine a relationship with a woman.
For the longest time, I could not see myself in a long term relationship with a woman. But once I overcame my internalized homophobia, I started to accept the idea more. And now, I can only see myself in a relationship with a woman. I don't think you should completely dismiss the idea of being with a man. During my questioning phase, I tried so hard to fit into a box or label that I kinda restricted myself from liking men altogether. However, I allowed myself to feel what I felt and eventually everything else fell into place. I think if you find yourself primarily attracted to women then you're gay. But, if you're having these thoughts, perhaps you should think about what it could be like being with a man. Not sexually, but emotionally, perhaps? I will admit that I have been with men, only one serious relationship and I have kids. But it was during a time when I thought if I tried not to be gay then I'd succeed. I failed miserably, btw.
Thanx for the responses guys! Holly: awesome i love having names for things! Thank you! Salazar: glad to know it will probably work out eventually Pinklov3ly: do you think it could be internalized homophobia? I have never considered myself homophobic but I guess anything is possible, plus I just recently realised I was gay so there could be a part of me subconsciously holding back. And it's not that I don't find guys attractive some times, (i do notice a good loking guy!) I'm just not attracted to them :lol:
Aha, that's me totally. They do catch my eye occasionally, but I honestly can't see myself doing anything more than a quick glance. Definitely couldn't date a guy...
I'm a guy, but totally the same thing. 25 years of repressed feelings and such.... Takes a hell of a lot of un-tangling your true feelings. When I finally did see things clearly, all of a sudden my apparent attraction to girls disappeared almost overnight.. Once I saw what 'true' attraction was, I recognised that what I had htought was real attraction was actually very forced/fake/superficial.
I'm feeling the same way sometimes, especially when talking to my friends and they're saying like "Gosh, see that hot guy over there?" I think yeah, he's kinda hot... I couldn't really imagine having sex with a guy, but a longterm relationship with a woman also seemed kinda wrong to me too... I've been thinking a lot lately and by now I'm at the point at which I would certainly be completely happy in a relationship with a woman, if I ever meet one ;-) Things will change, believe me... For good
