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I've made a huge mistake...I just don't know what to do

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by MyLittleWorld, Apr 15, 2014.

  1. MyLittleWorld

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    I'm just trying to do not throw away people I care for..
     
  2. PeytonRose

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    I'm saying to throw them to the curb completely. Be open and honest with them. Tell them that you're not ready for a relationship, you're not 100% invested and you both deserve better. Tell them that you need to work on yourself. Allow them to be there for you AS A FRIEND. The people that stick by you through this will prove to you how much they love you and care for you and you'll know who your true friends are at the end of this long and windy road.

    Give them every chance to be there for you and still accept them as friends, hang out, talk, whatever. But until you figure out what you want out of this life for yourself and how to make yourself truly happy, you just can't force a relationship to work. You'll end up making yourself and your partner miserable and you'll both end up resenting life. You deserve better....
     
  3. MyLittleWorld

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    I think I should really think about it.. Thank you.
     
  4. MyLittleWorld

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    I'm still trying to find out what I really want but one thing happened... I think my classmate is really beautiful. She is a girl. Today she playfuly held my hand it felt...amazing. I don't know what it is but I felt alive and I didn't wanted her to stop. We just walked and this touch felt ugh... I don't look at guys now... and I'm still with my bf. He held my hand and I wanted him to stop, I hated when he hugged me... I feel like a stone is on heart. I don't know if it means something or it's just nonsense?
     
  5. blond

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    I think you know what you want deep down but you're still afraid you'll hurt him. I'm not trying to sound like a jackass or anything, but you're hurting yourself, and i might out of line saying this, but you're hurting him by staying with him.

    It will hurt for awhile but i think you'll be happier without him. Plus you seem to really like this girl.
     
    #65 blond, Apr 23, 2014
    Last edited: Apr 23, 2014
  6. MyLittleWorld

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    I know what I want deep down but I can't accept these feelings... actually, he noticed the way I act and he knew I was bi now he started to talk about me only liking girls... maybe he feels it. He said he wants to be with me and make me happy and I want the same but at the same time I know that I will not be happy... and it makes me feel so guilty that he can't do anything to be with me...
     
  7. PeytonRose

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    This times a thousand.
     
  8. MyLittleWorld

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    If I will be with him I will hurt him and if I broke up with him I will hurt him too..
     
  9. PeytonRose

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    If you continue to be with him you're hurting both of you m'dear. If he truly cares for you he'll understand and appreciate the fact that you're breaking things off to avoid any further damage being done.
     
  10. MyLittleWorld

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    I hate hurting him. I haven't slept well for a week now. I don't want to eat and I can't study. I'm in total depression because of this... I love reading books and it is my escape for a while sometimes but still guilt is there.
     
  11. PeytonRose

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    At the end of the day the way I see it is that you have two choices.

    A.) You continue on your current path. Miserable (based on what you've said). You're settling for a guy that you're not sure you even love or even want to be with.

    B.) You break things off with your guy. Feelings will get hurt but you'll have a clean break and a chance to gain some perspective on your life. You'll be able to find out what you really want out of life and what exactly it is you're looking for. If you're current guy friend really cares for you he'll express gratitude for being honest with him and still want to be friends. If he gets hurt? He may still come back but you have to give him time and patience for that. The catch being that you'll be able to finally figure out what you want, you get a chance to be happier and so does he.

    The decision is up to you at the end of the day but I know which one I'd choose.....
     
  12. MyLittleWorld

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    Maybe I could ask him for a break..? I don't know..maybe it would help
     
  13. PeytonRose

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    Ask him for a break then. Just make sure it's clean and he understands that it could be a permanent thing...
     
  14. MyLittleWorld

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    It is too confusing. It feels like I don't want to leave him because I will be alone. I know some people might think that I'm terrible person because somehow I'm using him..but even I myself feel like a bad person.

    I spoke to my friend about this thing and she is straight she told me how she felt about guys.. I never felt it. I was out to her as bisexual but now I'm trying to accept the fact I like girls only... and it's so hard to accept. It really effects how I perform at school, my sleep, what I eat.. it's messed up.

    I just don't get it why I want to be with him if I don't want the future with him. I know where it is going and I'm still waiting. As I said I'm really afraid of being alone. Anyway, that's cruel thing to do for anyone. But I guess time will come and this will end...?