How difficult is be L or G or B or T?

I don't honestly think of being gay as a difficulty at all any more--it's just another thing about me (a terribly significant, but not trying, one). This was not always the case--I grew up in a time and an area where I assumed it would be very much not accepted (Utah and I'm 43--I was wrong about it not being accepted by the way) and in fact tried to kill myself over it my senior year in high school. So, for me at least, it really did get better--more better than I could have even imagined

 

Not that difficult being an L, honestly. There are so many LGBs within a one hour driving radius of my town. But it's truly a mixed bag. I live in a fairly accepting area, but this is still Texas after all, so there's still hardcore conservative Christians here, but it's not as difficult as one would imagine.

As far as my immediate family and friends go, they're all okay with it. My mom is actually trying to help me find all my lesbian friends/girlfriends haha. She's a great mom. My extended family doesn't know and they probably won't until I bring a girl home for Thanksgiving. Which will suck because that's a lot of people finding out all at once. I have a huge extended family.

As for being trans*, I don't really see a lot of them (that I know of, anyways). I do know that straight and queer people alike give them a hard time here. I'd imagine being trans* anywhere is hard. I have a friend who personally knows a transwoman that went to our school and she's doing great. High school was extremely hard for her though. I remember a LOT of teasing going on there.



---------- Post added 28th Aug 2014 at 07:34 AM ----------

I'm glad to hear that it got better for you.

 

It's not too hard being a B here. Most everyone is accepting, but every once in a while i run into a family that is really super religious. Theres two kids in my class that are like that, and they make school suck a lot. my parents, once i manage to work up the courage to actually tell them, will be accepting. In general though, its all pretty easy. The stress that tose two classmates put on me though makes it a little more difficult.

 

It's actually pretty easy being G here in Scotland. Everyone is pretty supportive. I've yet to tell my parents though, and I don't know how they'll take it. Should be fine though.

 

I thought we were talking about how hard it was to say it. I thought I was the only one and from the looks of it, I guess I am. For some reason I keeps saying LGBYT. I don't know where the Y comes from and when I say LGBT it's like I can't. I have to literally say the words "lesbian gay bi trans."

 

Well for me it's the unwanted harassment I get from men,it's one of the reasons ;I'm not fully out as lesbian and don't tell men I'm gay, they always take it as a challenge. I have only met one man that was respectful.
Another thing l have to worry about is homophobic female friends and that try to pressure me, into going with men and don't take your sexuality seriously. Or the annoying your too pretty to be lesbian comments.
Not to mention homophobic parents who think, forcing you to go to church will cure me and turn me straight. I would be much better off being a gay man, in my house.
The thing in my town is lesbians are so invisible, gay men get everything , it's easier for them to meet people.
I just can't stand the lack of respect and the invisibility it's like my town doesn't even care about lesbians.:tantrum:

 

So far it has been a confusing pain in the arse.

 

I think it's about equally difficult being lesbian and gay, although if you're a gay man and a femme it might present some additional problems. Bi is arguably easier, but you face a unique set of stereotypes in addition to the usual homophobic ones. For example people might not take you seriously as a bisexual, and chock it up to being a phase. I think much harder than all of these is being trans or genderqueer. Being gay receives backlash for violating a few gender roles and customs. Being trans violates just about every possible gender custom, and atleast half of the people willing to date you will view you as a fetish object. Being genderqueer is about as difficult as trans, but even less people will be willing to date you, and most people don't even know that your gender is a thing. Also you'll need to be willing to fight hard if you want to get people to use your preferred pronouns.

 

Not too difficult where I am, granted I am a student on a fairly liberal campus so hardly anyone says anything. Perhaps I'm assuming I have an easier time based on omission, but I do know there's a fairly large percentage of queer students, and a few campus organisations. I live in a progressive city that's queer-friendly, so I'm not heavily concerned about my safety and rarely do I find myself in 'difficult' situations, with the exception of some guys who might assume I'm just a feminine gay boy, and give me shit over that, but I don't really care that much. Anything trans-related is hardly brought up, and when it is, it's in a safe context. There's plenty of visibility here, which brings awareness, and leads to understanding.

 

For me personally, not very difficult as the area here is pretty LGBT friendly, there's the occasional homophobe, but most people are either indifferent or supportive around here.
The only difficulties I do experience is not being taken seriously when coming out as bi and people assuming I'm straight.

And then there's the problem of not finding a significant other, but that's got more to do with me than my orientation.

 

its better now but in the past I struggled allot.

 

For me, it's not difficult being trans. It's difficult dealing with the bullshit I get because I'm trans.

If my parents allowed me transition and everyone else was supportive, everything would be OK.

But in this world, even if my parents supported me, a lot of other people won't. And that's the way it will always be - with everything. I'll just learn to deal with it.

 

For me it's difficult, as I'm not out to everyone (and where I live I can't come out to everyone) and I have to watch what I'm saying and where I'm saying things. It makes me live in a constant stress. Sometimes I hate myself for being me, and can't look in the mirror.

But life goes on, eh.

 

Being G will be a lot better when I finally come out to the family and start meeting other G's. Right now, I'm stuck living a life that isn't mine anymore.

 

Not difficult here...I'm either accepted or invisible (with only a couple unimportant exceptions). The invisibility is a pain in the butt sometimes (e.g., it would be nice to be recognized as a couple when my partner and I go out to dinner...to a romantic restaurant, with candlelight...on Valentine's Day...at least when we hold hands or kiss! LOL). But no...we're always asked if we want separate checks. *sigh*

But I'll take invisibility over hate or violence any day...as long as we have that invisibility without hiding in any way. It's just peoples' own limitations in play...and if they are limited, then they are...not much we can do about it.

 

The prejudice I get from some people is difficult for me to handle. I'm just at a loss how some people (my family included) can think the way they do. But I have a good support system of understanding friends and getting on here helps a lot!

 

Being the B is pretty safe in my area; there have been a handful of people I'd like to hit in the face a few times, but overall most people have been pretty cool with it. About three people have actually high-fived me for coming out the them.

 

Being G is much easier for me than being heterosexual. I used to try but it never really stuck.

Surprisingly for home of the Westboro Baptist Church, Topeka, Kansas is much more accepting of LGBT people than you would think.

I think some people support LGBT people just because they hate the WBC.

 

I'd say people here are half/half accepting. I sure met quite a few bigots who enjoy beating gays, and I've also met a few accepting people.

At most, I would meet people who don't know what to think of it. They don't have much of their own opinions of the subject.

I don't think it shows too much with me, but just knowing that I'm open and out now is easier. I just make sure that the person isn't a gay-basher before telling people my sexuality.

The easiest place to find work is in industries and factories, and being gay isn't very well accepted in there at all.

 

I've lived here for three years so far and have yet to talk to anymore than four or so of my neighbors for more than three seconds so there's that, nobody in the neighborhood bothers me though. Nobody in the neighborhood knows my orientation or even knows my name and given the area's reputation for strange going ons in the woods I'll keep it that way to be on the safe side. Only issue is the loneliness which prompts me to spend a lot more time online than I should.