Funny responses you got when you came out

To my friend whom I know he's gay

Friend: How is it possible that you have no girlfriend? I guess being hetero brings unluckiness to love.
Me: What if I like men instead?
Friend: No my God, this can't be possible. Since when?!
Me: WTF? What a stupid question from also a gay person?! Since my birth of course!

 

Two funny reaction so far -

Me: I just want to tell you that I'm gay.
Mom: who told you that? (It definitely wasn't funny at the time tho)

Me: I'm into girls.
Friend: but how does the sex work?
Me: it's not that different from straight sex.
Friend: okay, so how does straight sex work? (She's 21)

 

Me coming out to my friend as transgender.
me: I'm a girl.
friend: so that's y u were wearing dresses and heels in kindergarten while playing house! I knew there was something about with you!

before all that, after i said that, he kind of just stared at me, then started yelling and smiling all at once. it was so random and loud that I just burst out laughing. Then people started looking at us weird because they all heard us, but they didnt know what I had said. The looks on their face were priceless.

 

Storm (friend): What's your passcode?
*grabs iPad. Unlocks it*
Me: Woah, you don't wanna see that.
Garren (other friend): What is it? Girls french-kissing?
Me: Wrong gender (quietly)
Joz (other friend): Dick pics
Garren: What? (he's hard of hearing)
Joz: Dick pics
Me: I'm gay!!!
Joz, Storm, and I bursted out laughing while Garren was confused

It was more of a had to be there moment.

 

Me: I like girls
Friend: But you listen to One Direction!!!
Me: Well they sing about girls, and I'm attracted to girls... duh
Friend: Ooohh it all makes sense now

 

Me: Yoo, im bi
Friend: Have you told your parents yet?
Me: No
Friend: Tell them

Over text
Me: I like sausages
Friends: You have a weird obsession with Sausages, Ethan.
Me: I never said they were the kind you eat
Friends: What?
*continue on normal conversation for a bit*
I wasn't satisfied with that response
Me: What the fuck guys, i say I like penis and no one even says a word, I'm disappointed. A "welcome to the club" would be nice.
Friends: *silence*
Me: Tough crowd? I'll show myself out.
(they were accepting, they really didn't care that i was bi)

One of my friends approached me
Friend: Wait, are you really bi or were you joking?
Me: I really am.
Friend: Like the thought of having a relationship with a guy isn't disgusting to you?
Me: Nope, neither is one with a girl.
Friend: Do you have feelings for me?
Me: Nope
Friend: All G

Coming out as genderfluid
Me: Yo guys, from now on call me Ash, btw pronouns are they or she. Thanks
Friend 1 (K): Huh?
Me: I'm nit your average cisgender.
K: Oh, what do you identify as?
Me: Gender Fluid
Friend 2 (W): What the hell is that
Me:/)_-
K: /)_-
Friend 3 (N): /)_-
Me: Shall I explain?
K: You must
Friend 4 (E): I shall, *long ass explaination*
Me: Thanks E!
E: No problem

 

I was having a chat with a straight friend of mine last night.
He told me that he saw his son (20 & straight) getting ready to go out for the night, so he asked him where he was going. The response was:
“I’m going to a coming out party”
“?”
“One of the lads came out as gay so all the gang are having a party to celebrate”
":eek:"

How things have changed since I was young!

ride:

 

Me and my BFF were being driven to a hockey game, her parents and little brother in the front, and me, her, and her boyfriend all sat in the back. I grabbed my phone, unlocked it, and opened up Notes. Obviously, Lily (my friend) looked. She is a curious person XD We took turns passing my phone back forth - this is what we wrote...

ME: Hey Lil, I have something to tell you.
HER: ?
ME: You have to promise you'll still be my friend, no matter what.
HER: Of course. What is it?
ME: Make sure Mark doesn't see. Lol.
(Mark is Lily's boyfriend)
ME: I'm bi.
HER: ...
HER: Sooo...that explains you were checking out that girl at the mall?
ME: Let's leave it at that.
HER: THANK GOD!

XD

 

-A good friend is sitting in the library, being quiet and watching videos on his phone.

-Enter: me, sitting down beside him. I've been staring at him for a good three minutes on how I'm going to do this.

-We talk about music for a minute (but I'm thinking the whole time). I mentioned that there was a reason why I'm talking to him at that moment.

-10 seconds of me saying "uhhhh"

-I type into my phone's google searchbar...

- "Plot Twist: I'm gay!"

-He laughs for a long time and asks if this is a social experiment

-"Have I ever done one before?"

-"No way! You're just fucking with me!" (still laughing)

-It took another 20 seconds for him to believe it, his face looked like somebody was tickling him the entire time, hahaha

 

This was when I came out to my mom

Me: Mom can I tell you something?
Her: Sure.
Me: I'm gay.
Her: And...
Me: I just thought you should know.
Her: I already knew, you were terrible at hiding it.
Me: Oh.... ok

 

Hi all,

This is a rather long story, but it is funny in the end, I promise. :lol:

I hope this isn't too long for this thread; I'm combining a coming out story and a funny story all in one.

I've been out to certain close friends for years, but not work friends and people who I share my hobbies with (model railroading, flight simulator, etc.). But I recently retired, and this has made me change my views on being gay (I'm still pretty shy about the whole thing though). See below.

I have a friend (we'll call him Bob; all the names but mine have been changed) I met at a model RR club that likes me to come up and see him and his wife in LA - mostly to help him set up his flight simulator program, but we also run some model trains on occasion. I've known him for over 15 years at this point. He is a typical Republican as far as politics is concerned, but we don't typically discuss that. I had never told him, since it really never came up.

The other day I received a bulk email Bob had forwarded to me, with a picture of a line of dogs, all very different from each other. The text read something like "I've signed up all my dogs for welfare, since they lay around all day and sleep, and are very "diverse" (code word). They got their first check today."

Well, this really ticked me off - "He should know me better than this by now", I thought. So I sent him the following (rather brusque) email around mid-morning:

-------------------

Hi Bob,

I received your last email ​joking about dogs getting welfare. This is rather upsetting to me, and does not reflect my views.

I have been re-evaluating the way I appear to my friends, and apparently I have not done a good job making people aware of me and my views, or I they do know and don't care.

I am gay. I am liberal. I am a Democrat. I would prefer not to receive mail that denigrates myself and my beliefs.

I would love for us to continue being friends, but if you would find this uncomfortable or distasteful, I certainly would not wish to make you uneasy. Please feel free to either let me know this, or just stop communicating and I'll get the message.

Sorry to do this in an email but I am not good at talking about my feelings; I hope you can understand.

My very best wishes to you and Sandra for the future, of course.

Take care,

---------------------

I heard nothing from him until that night (a rather long time for him), and I was expecting something not quite happy and light. But I received a reply that said he was so sorry and hoped that it would not affect our friendship, and that he hoped I was still coming to see them in a few weeks. Nice! OK, all is well.

I went to sleep that night, and at 2:30 am was suddenly wide awake. I thought "I'm retired now, I don't have to worry about work anymore (not that I really *had* to before), so why not come out to the people that I care about?" I was on a roll! I probably got another 2 hours of sleep that night.

So in the morning I sent a much nicer email to some mutual friends of Bob's and I telling them that I was gay, with some of the language I had used in George's email (I liked the wording). We'll call them John (another model RR club friend who is over 80) and Carol (his daughter, who takes care of him). I got a call at around 10:30 am from Carol saying "Yeah, so what. Want to come to lunch with us?" I love her. I asked about John, and she said he was fine with it too. So I went to lunch and we had a wonderful time talking about my (long) history and such.

But then I thought I should tell them that I had told Bob, since they were sure to run into him at some point, and they should know that. I started telling them the story above, all about the bulk email and such, and they got this very funny look on their faces. Turns out it was for two entirely different reasons. The first admission was from John, who told me it was he that had originally forwarded that email to Bob. Oops! I told him I didn't mind. But the real shocker was when Carol told me - "Tom, I know all about it - Bob called me last night". Oh? What was said?

Bob: Carol, I think I blew it with Tommy (his pet name for me). I need some advice.
Carol: Why do you say that?
B: I sent him that joke email that John had sent to me, and Tommy replied with a really angry email.
C: What was in this email John sent you? I never got one.
B: I've forwarded both emails to you.
C: OK, got them. Dad, why didn't you send this email to me?
John: Because I knew you'd get mad if I did.
C: And why didn't you forward it to Tom?
J: Same reason.
C: Bob, why didn't you forward that email to me?
B: I'm not crazy - you would have killed me!
C: Exactly. You knew I wouldn't like to see something like that. And what do you think about Tom - does he think like me?
B: Yes, he does.
C: So why did you forward that email to him?
B: Because I'm an idiot...
C: Exactly. So now you're going to send him an email and apologize for being an idiot, right?
B: Good idea, I'll send it right away.

And that's why I had to wait until that night to get his reply. John, Carol, and I were almost rolling on the ground laughing so hard while this whole story unfolded. It has to be one of the funniest moments of my life. I told them "Well, I'm glad I sent you your own email this morning then!" More hilarity ensued.

After getting back from lunch I called my best friend from work and told her - she had already guessed. We stayed on the phone for an hour, and we did everything from answer some of her questions (i.e. are you and Fred (another friend) a couple? - no, just Flight Sim buddies) to speculate on some coworkers at work (I don't know, I don't have gaydar).

So that's my story. Now everyone I really care about knows. I realize that for many of you younger folk, this story seems easy and has an almost fake happy ending. But please realize that when I told the first friend (and his girlfriend) way back in 1975, I cried because it was so hard for me. And I've lived much of my life in the closet, mostly because I could never accept the "gay lifestyle" that other gay people expected me to follow (I hate shopping, fashion, etc.). Coming out in LA in the radical 80's you couldn't get away with being you , you had to be a "clone". I just walked away from all of that in 1984 when I moved to another city. But now I am reconnecting with my roots, in a way that lets me be me. And that's what it's all about, right?

Thanks for listening!

 

Hello! My little story is quite short, but I think it's hilarious.
She took it very well

Her: So [other friend] told me you had something to tell me?
Me: Um. Yeah...
Her: Okay, what?!
Me: Well... Um... (about 3 minutes of this)
Me: Okay. I like men like I like coffee. (She knows that I hate coffee.)
Her: You like black guys?!
Me: *mental facepalm* Noooooo... Think about it.
Her: Oh, you don't like coffee do you?
Me: Uh huh.
Her: Are you...?
Me: Say it!
Her: lesbian?
Me: Yep!
Her: AWESOME!!! *practically tackles me with a huge hug*
Me: So you don't care?
Her: No that's so cool!

Needless to say, I was very surprised by her reaction. She totally missed the point though. I was trying to be funny! Every time we made eye contact that night, she practically had a heart attack of excitement. I think she was happier about it than me!

 

Me: I'm transgender.
Best friend: Well duh, that's obvious.

Me: I'm trans.
Friend: Okay, want some nachos?

(Favorite)
Me: I'm Trans
Third friend: Okay, hand me a beer princess.
I love my friends

 

So I this is how I came out to one of my best friends:

ME: So I've got something to tell you
HER: What is it?
ME: Ummm... you know about (me: stalling)
HER: Hurry up
ME: Ok... Ummmm... (this went on for about two minutes)
HER: (Losing the will to live face)
ME: I'm Bi
HER: (Giant griin on her face, then she hugged me)
ME: So you don't care
HER: I couldn't care if you were straight, gay, bi or a money
ME: Oh ok
HER: Or a gay monkey (pause) or a bi monkey (pause) or even a straight monkey
ME: This is why you are my bestfriend

 

TwoWays, is your whole life this adorable ?

 

^That would be amazing :3

 

friends' 4yo kid: Uncle _____, are you a boy or a girl?
kid's parents: Stop asking him that.
(little girl laughs, and repeats for about 20 minutes. my friends/the kid's parents annoyance levels increase exponentially.)
...
A couple months later...
me (to the kid's mom): You know, your daughter is very observant.
my friend/the kid's mom: yeah...
me: I think she's figured out that I'm not exactly a guy...
her: OK. Just let me know if/when you change your name.
....
yesterday....
me (to the kid's dad, he's trying to help me get a better job): How LGBT friendly is it where you work?
him: It's not really come up, and if you worked there, it wouldn't have to come up.... (he already knew I am bi)
me: it probably would... I'm transgendered.
him: Well, that topic definitely hasn't come up before at work, so I don't know. Doesn't surprise me about you, though. I kinda figured there might be something like that with you.


I love my friends.

 

So I've been super lucky to go to an amazing, open, hippie-dippie we love everyone type school for my entire life, and since it's also a really small school, I've known most of my classmates forever, and they're basically my second family (my teachers are my third family, and my kung-fu school is my fourth).

Anyway, we were having a whole class (all 15 of, lol) sleepover/party thing, cause an exchange student who'd been in our class for almost six months was leaving the next day, and as we always seem to we got onto the topic of sexuality. I was having a side conversation with a friend, and just sorta casually mentioned that I was bi. Literally the second the words were out of my mouth, there was dead silence, and then one of the girls yells "Oh my god? Are you bi? Did you just say you're bi? Please tell me you said you're bi!" And I was just like "...Yeah? I'm bi?"

And literally everyone in the room jumped on top of me. Such cuddle fests shall never again be witnessed.

 

I remember when I came out to my bro- went like this:

Me: Yo. Want to talk to you.
Bro: Mhm (playing game)
Me: Uh... I'm a guy
Bro: Mmmmhm (still playing game)
Me: Are you going to say anything?
Bro: Get some different pants. Those look girly.
Me: ...
Bro: (dies in game) *loud profanity*

It was very cool. He just accepted it, like that. And then screamed loudly at his Xbox.