I'm honestly sorry this is so long, but I'd really appreciate any advice or consolation, or for you guys tot ell me this doesn't only happen to me. I think I need to really fix myself up. I procrastinate really bad. I used to get really good grades because I broke my habit of not studying for a while and for maybe 1 year, I was doing pretty well. I stayed up late a lot, but atleast I was doing work. Now, I’ve fallen back even worst. My grades are going to shit again. Maybe not to shit, but nothing like I could do. I want to do well, but I can’t. I end up not doing work the entire day. I don’t even know how it happens because it upsets me a lot and gives me intense stress when I don’t work, but I still do it. Eventually, it’s the a.m. hours and maybe it’s a school night and I haven’t done my homework. At this point, I’ve procrastinated so much that I need to go to bed. Instead, I half ass my work and barely study for tests, so I end up sleeping 2 or 3 hours before I go to school. So I’ve been doing shitty work while sleeping 3 hours on average every day for the past few months. I honestly tried to force myself, but I’m so stuck in this habit that I can’t break it. I feel like I’m getting sick a lot more, my health is pretty bad, way worst than before. I have a lot of medical issues and I get a lot of pains and headaches. My skin is lifeless looking and sometimes when I go to school, I look in the mirror and I look like someone sickly and colorless. I feel constant remorse about how my grades are slowly declining after I worked so hard to yank them back up but I still can’t force myself to do anything. I don’t even know what I do, I watch lots of youtube videos and watch netflix I guess. But even when I lock those away, there’s always something. Always. I don’t know what to do. Because I feel stressed to the point that I just need to slam my head against the wall over and over until I get hurt and I’m so scared I’m making myself ill. My self esteem is dropping because I’m losing weight and people can see me struggling in school. I’m so sad and tired, and I feel like I’m doing even worst because I barely sleep. While I feel like no one can help me because it shouldn’t be someone else’s job to make me do something I should be proficient enough to do, I still don’t do it and I’m so disappointed in myself. I don’t think I actually deserve to be happy because I feel like I need to punish myself. I feel like everything’s slowly accumulating and college application deadlines are around the corner, so I honestly don’t know what to do. I know this sounds pathetic because my issues are trivial and it’s self induced. I’m not really suffering, I don’t have a drug addiction and I’m not an alcoholic but I feel like my heads about to pop and I need advice, any advice. Thank you.
Aw mate, I woke up just now at 1300 so I can relate. And I've lost some weight too. Grades are still fine but that only a matter of time..can you guess what I'm doing now? I'm sitting on a bed replying to a thread on EC while I should get out and at least take a shower and do some shopping! I suppose this is my cue to leave.
About your health, have you tried seeing a doctor? It could be something more that is causing stress. If it is only about study, i also have this problem. I procrastinate a lot. However, i realized that there is no magical recipe for this, unfortunately. When you search for "How to study" or something like that on the internet, you will see lots of tips and tricks and motivational stuff. To me, and, in my opinion, most of these things do not work. Discipline is the best answer to procrastination. Set a time to begin your work, 3PM lets say. Prepare your desk and stuff before this time and, when the clock gets to 3PM, start doing whatever you need to do. It doesn't matter if you do it fast, or if you do it slow, just start and focus on it. The most important thing is to start at the time you set. In this example, it can't be 3:05 PM, it can't be 4 PM "just to finish one more episode of this anime...". Respect the time you set for yourself. Another two things that can help you focus, and i recommend very much: Use the kanban method to organize yourself. Take a piece of paper (or you can use this website, which i recommend https://kanbanflow.com/ ), and draw 4 collumns. Name them, in the order: "To do", "For today", "Doing it", "Done! =) " In "To do", put everything you need to do. Everything, like paying bills, studying for Zoology, taking the trash out, etc. Move then for "For Today", when, obviously, you need to do the task on that day. Just before starting, move to "Doing it" And when finished, move to "Done! =)". As i use the site i mentioned, i like to set different collors for my tasks. Red is for very important, white is for not so important, yellow is for somewhat important, and green is for everything that moved in to the Done collumn. The important thing is to always move things to the Right. You cannot move something to "For Today" and just not finish it, and move it to "To Do" again. You need to keep going right. Allied with this technique, use the Pomodoro technique. Let's say, you started working at 3PM. Set an alarm in your smartphone for 3:25PM. At that time, stop whatever you are doing, and do something else. You can browse Facebook, you can eat something, do anything but studying. At 3:35 (some people recommend a 5 min pause, but i personally work better with 10 minutes), get back to work again, for more 25 minutes, then pause again, etc. , until you finish what you have to do. Also, you cannot stop a pomodore (the 25 minutes). If you have finished your work and still have 5 minutes left, use that time to review your work. So, in resume, i think discipline is the most important thing. It isn't easy, i still struggle a lot with these things, but you and i have to train ourselves to study. Unfortunately, there is no easy way. But, again, as i said, you should see a doctor if you are experience some health alterations. It could be something more than just stress.
Thank you so much :> I will try those methods I guess, I just feel so frustrated because I feel like methods never work for me more than a day. I guess I have to keep trying. It's just bad now because everyone I know is finishing up their college applications and I haven't done much, and it's probably affecting the quality of my apps. And I will o to the doctor if my health doesn't get better. My health is undoubtedly declining.
