My wife knows everything

Herewego

Last week we were crying on each other's shoulders. This week it is high fives!

Amazing women in our lives!

 

Update. My wife and I are still in high spirits. No crash yet!

We did discuss how badly she felt that I was angry over the last couple of years. I told her that I knew I was angry but could not identify why and attributed it to stress and not her even though she was the recipient.

She also wanted to know how I could not tell her about my bisexuality all these years. I explained that when one starts hiding this so young (14 or so for me) that it is just sitting below a barrier deep at the bottom of the soul. You know it's there but you can keep it where it is supposed to be. I just couldn't let it out. She also mentioned her best friendship was with a gay guy and I should have known how she felt.

Then she wanted details of my CL almost encounter. I told her it was for mutual hand jobs. She started laughing again. "Good grief. I knew when I met you that you would always behave like a teenager! I don't think I would have cared! You got pretty wound up over nothing"!

We discussed how we could accommodate our divergent sex drives and get a little bit of gay into our play. She is receptive and thought it would be fun. But, she indicated that it may not be enough for me and I just needed to let her know this and we would figure something out.

It feels really good to finally accept myself. I think the sexual part I kept trapped was not the only thing under that barrier. It's all out now, and it is great!

 

COS

The place I took my wife to tell her about my bisexuality is an area where we hung out back over thirty years ago before we married. Back then I was exuberant and free. Both of us were. We would, literally, run naked through the desert for hours. Laugh and joke all night long. Neither of us had ever experienced anything like that before in our lives.

So, I have our memories as my ally in this. We are drawing on our past to figure out how to go forward. My wife is, actually, sort of excited about this in a non-sexual way. It is another adventure! It will be fun!

In the end, when my wife is happy, I am happy and vice versa.

In all other aspects of my life I have been willing to share with my wife. It is so unbelievable to me that I couldn't do this with my sexuality and how big an impact that had.

We are older (near 60) So, that makes a difference. We are not bound, any longer, by societal constraints or expectations. I don't know if we could have done this 30 years ago.

This raises a question to me as I read other posts from middle aged married guys. I know that openness and honesty are absolutely necessary. And, certainly, self-acceptance...But, sometimes do we give up too soon on our marriages? I almost did. It is absolutely necessary not to assume we know what our spouses want or need. I think the biggest issue is if our spouses can accept us. If they can, and love us deeply, there may be a whole new world waiting.

 

Thanks COS, LFM,bi2me,brians34,kyspo and Teach1