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Worst coming out

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by LastChance, Jan 14, 2014.

  1. LastChance

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 14, 2014
    Messages:
    1
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    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    All but family
    I am lucky, my parents were kind, my dad actually cried with happiness when I told him I found someone, my mother is uncomfortable but happy for me, my sister is disapproving as a very religious person, but she is rarely rude.

    I have been living with my Partner for 2 and 1/2 years. Her parents were...her bosses, our landlords, and used these positions a lot. We decided to tell them, so they may not accidentally find out since they often showed up randomly, and many times we have almost been caught.

    We wanted to tell both, but she was worried, and we only told her mother. She told us her father would be violently angry, as his sister is a lesbian and is hated by the family, and seemed honestly scared for us. Made us promise a whole lot of things, some of which were just flat out lies on our part. She says we never should have told her, that it was malicious, but that she still cared for us.

    A few weeks later, her mother's cancer gets much much worse, she starts getting paranoid around everyone, I at first help her out, but she starts calling my lover tainted and refuses for her to touch anything. Calls me a seductress and a thief(because I mentioned I would marry her daughter if it was the fact we were unmarried, and she felt I was out to get their money) and begs my lover to break up with me.(She pretended to, we are still very much together)

    A week before Christmas...she dies. This has made us scared to even be seen outside together, as her fathers friends might find out. We are tied financially to her father, along with a strong filial obligation. He is a good kind man, and we keep thinking her mother might have been too paranoid, and just said he may get violent. Still we worry. Coming out to anybody has been hard. And we are scared even as grown women this is both heartbreaking and terrifying and we have no idea what to do.
     
  2. Vito Jefferson

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2014
    Messages:
    7
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    0
    Location:
    Dorset, UK
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Wow, sorry to hear you're having such a rough time. Have you tried talking to her sister to see how he reacted with her? Can you find a way to get out of your financial obligations to him?
    Whatever happens just be great full you have each other and that your family is supportive.
    I hope things turn out well for you both
     
  3. daisy2468

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    May 25, 2016
    Messages:
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    Location:
    arizona
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    I actually know how you feel. I mean I've came out to my parents multiple times and I still find it so absurd that they can't accept me for me. About a week ago, I decided to tell them again...(for the 7th time) my mother had started crying along with my father. My mother compared me to a former close friend who sleeps with every guy at school now and said "You're much more worst than her. She maybe sleeping with every guy but you are a disappointment,do you realize that?" Out of all things she's told me,that's something that I will remember. My father, he said the basic stuff any homophobic parent say,such as "where did we go wrong? what will everyone else in the family say? We've given you everything and this is what you give us in return? etc..." He honestly had me crying. He asked me if I had a girlfriend,which I don't but I am seeing someone and Im afraid if we get in a relationship they'll kick me out or even scream at me. They told me I should change my ways and to have faith.I hope to move out after I finish school... Meanwhile,I'm still in the closet feeling empty & hopeless but I do my best to be happy.