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Should I invite him over tomorrow? And does he like me?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by don29002, Oct 18, 2011.

  1. don29002

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    So I'm 15, a bi guy, and a sophomore in high school.
    I have a good friend who's a senior named Matt. He's 17, I turned 15 in August. Freshman year we both had the same lunch I would go to his lunch table and sit with his friends and tell funny stories and jokes and him and his friends loved me for it freshman year.
    But I noticed him staring at me frequently while I'd be telling my stories. Every day.
    And he'd pull me close to him with his thumb touching my chin, which I thought was romantic in a way.
    And around Christmas time last year he told me "All I want for Christmas is you" and I smiled at him. Considering the fact that he has a (now ex) girlfriend named Paige.
    Back then Paige barely noticed--she didn't even look up at us--but I guess I got her approval lol

    Now I have these thoughts about not wanting to lose him, (since he's older than me) him becoming my next boyfriend, and sometimes I even fantasize about him. He's incredibly sexy though
    But even though we've been friends for one whole year, I feel like there's a side of me that he needs to know about; my human side. What I'm like outside of school. (We only know each other from school)

    I've been thinking of things to do with him. He could come over my house; see me sing or do my standup; or I could enter a talent/performing contest where I do something in front of a live audience and win things.

    I've thought about inviting him over to my house tomorrow and he'd come over Friday night and spend the night with me and leave Saturday evening. Because my mom works from 6 to 5 on Fridays and Saturdays each week, so I'd be home all alone; I'm a homebody and an only child.
    Also if he decides to come over what are some things we can do or talk about? I have a PS3 and 2 laptops, so, yeah...

    Also he broke up with his ex girlfriend after she went to college; he's here in New Jersey as a senior in high school and she's started college in Maryland at the U of MD in Baltimore.
    Only other bad part is I wanna make something out of our friendship, maybe being more than friends, before he graduates and probably forgets about me! What can I do to prevent that from happening?
     
  2. LookingGlass

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    Invite him to hangout somewhere and then invite him over later. Be sure to talk a lot. Don't assume he's gay or bi though. Just talk to him and give it time. See what happens.
     
  3. Andrew1403

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    This is a good idea...go out for lunch like buffalo wild wings or something ..see how it goes ... don't be left wondering "what if? or what could have been?" after hes gone away to college.

    Those were very affectionate things you mentioned earlier..seems like you guys have a close bond. Eventually just tell him how you feel even thou thats hard scary thing to do.
     
  4. Mad Man L

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    Firstly, before making any move, you need to establish whether he is actually gay or bi. While this "All I want for Christmas is You" kind of stuff, some guys are straight yet are more than comfortable with doing touchy/feely kind of stuff with other men.

    I would invite him over and just talk about guy stuff. And by that, I mean straight guy-straight guy conversations. Like you normally would. And go from there.
     
  5. don29002

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    So today I saw Matt during 6th period and I talked to him about coming over and driving me home. This is our convo:

    Me: "Matt whats good! Can you drive me home after school?"
    Matt: "No I have detention today."
    Me: "Oh.... well do you wanna come over [my apartment] Friday and Saturday?"
    Matt: "No I can't, we're going away to some kid's house over the weekend."

    So no boy. And no company. Boo hoo.
    Yet I have visions of his beautiful face popping up in my head, or me and him together talking or kissing or whatever. And I'm supposed to let him get away?
    Now I just saw a Two and a Half Men episode where Charlie keeps seeing Rose everywhere he goes; Rose was a woman obsessed with Charlie who he didn't want but when she left America for London, he realized how valuable she was to him.
    I'm Rose, Matt's [kinda] Charlie.

    Thoughts?
     
  6. Mad Man L

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    You're overthinking things. You can think up random situations in your head and try and create stories in your mind as much as you want, but more likely than not, it simply won't happen.

    You're getting ahead of yourself here. I will admit, I do the same with my straight crush, but save yourself the pain and calm your farm.
     
  7. Gerry

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    I say invite him over to hang out and see what happens. Don't think about things too much. Having a really elaborate plan just usually fails in some way or another. Be natural and be yourself. :slight_smile:
     
  8. Alex19

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    i agree with what others said. invite him over whenever hes free and just hang out. first off, does he even know about you? if not, that might be somewhere to start.. and there's only a slight chance he might be into guys so its better to bank on him being straight so you don't get excited for nothing
     
  9. don29002

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    I'd love it if we were that close, but for now all it is is me telling him humor stories to make him laugh and grow our bond with each other, and him trying to open up. I've wanted him to just tell me he's gay/bi now for the longest time now. But my love for him has grown so much that one night I was tossing and turning for 3 and a half hours trying to fall asleep but couldn't because I saw visions of him in my mind, like mental pictures and him and me in his car talking about things, and some of them were my fantasies of what I hope happens with our friendship. I have my first time with him, he proposes to marry me when I turn 18, I tell him I'm bi and that I love him with all my heart--which is what I'm trying to do in real life now anyway but can't get the words out even though I see him literally every day--and other things.
    I want a love like the movie "Gone With the Wind" the iconic 1939 movie. Like Rhett Butler and Scarlett O'Hara have for each other, except it would be me and Matt, and Matt wouldn't be telling me, "Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn."