Where to find a GF? Do I even deserve one?

[MommaFrog]

I want one... not really a physical relationship. I'm even ok with long distance. I want someone I can text 24/7. Call. Chat with. email, game with. Stuff like that. I want an emotional connection. I want someone to open up to and trust. Someone to open up to me. Someone to fall in love with that way. THEN see face to face. Let things go from there....

Is that too much to ask?

Do I even deserve one?

Even if I do, I have no idea where to look... I'm so lost.... TT__TT

[Hot Pink]

Of course you deserve love. Why wouldn't you? As to where to look, I'm not sure of that myself.

[Random Dent]

I ask myself the same question.

Everyone deserves love.

[Kcaz12345]

Yes you do deserve it (I kno I don't from what I did to my bf today ) everyone deserves love .I can't tell you where to find one because I believe there is a rule ahi st that here

[stuwee]

What you're describing Momma is perhaps the best way to fall in true love, with a friend first. It dosen't work for everyone (makes some folks very uncomfortable, like messing around with a 'sister'). I applaud your choice in finding a mate/companion/friend . We all deserve a love in our life

An aside, I have banned myself from being around anyone I may get close to, because of past hurts, don't be like me...GO For IT!!!

[Chouchou]

Where'd that silly notion of not deserving a girlfriend come from? Disabuse yourself of that notion forthwith.

I wouldn't know of a place to look either, because I'm also looking. Serendipity seems as much of a way to success as online dating or all those other "prescribed" methods for finding a partner. Wish I could say more.

(And at this very instant, "Somebody to Love Me" comes up on iTunes. That thing is psychic.)

[J Snow]

Of course you deserve someone, Liz. You are an awesome person I wish I could give advice too, but all I can think to say is give an online dating site a try, but that's kind of obvious generic advice. I met my bf on one though.

[Filip]

Of course that's not too much to ask! I'd even say it's a sensible approach (well, provided you either don't make it TOO long distance, or that you're fine with the idea of keeping it long distance if meeting up isn't feasible)



As for how to find one: both easy and not easy. You want something to slowly develop, so you need to accept that this isn't something you can just set out to find.
Dating sites are generally populated with people who want a date, and want it now (or at least within a short timeframe). So while I wouldn't discount them, don't expect too much from them.

The truth really is that you do this by making many acquaintances, hope that some of these will become friends, and that among those, there could be one who'll become a bit more. And even that last step is really not something you should actively aim for, but just be open to the possibility.

Where do you make such acquaintances? Well, everywhere, basically. If distance isn't a factor, the internet is your neighbourhood. There's sites full of people looking for penpals.
You mentioned gaming? Then see if there's an online community dedicated to your favourite game, join it, and get talking to like-minded people.
Keep in contact with the ones you click with, and don't mourn when you never hear from the ones you don't click with. (and obviously, it needs to be said: always keep your eyes open and don't trust people too soon) Even if you don't find someone who ends up as more than a friend, it's still a good way to have a good time

[stuwee]

Lots of great advice Momma, we're all part of a plan, no one knows what it's really all about, my Dad used to say I don't care what church you go to, just go to church (not the best advice for many, but...).

He asked me why I went to so many differant churches, I said "Dad, some folks respond to dance, the spoken word, or the music, I go for the music, It brings me up...)

Simple Minds says it to me, give it a listen Simple Minds - Alive and Kicking (live) - YouTube , enjoy

[Tiny Catastrophe]

Don't think you don't deserve someone. Everyone deserves to find someone. Based on my experiences, online and long distance isn't always the best idea. I met my ex online and it was also long distance and she turned out to be a horrible person after a while. People can pretend to be anyone online and the long distance thing didn't help. I'm not saying that's true for everyone you meet but I would be cautious if you're going to try that. I found that going out looking for someone doesn't exactly work out for the best and sometimes you end up settling for less than you want and/or deserve simply because that person is there and giving you some of what you want (again how I found my ex). I think just letting it happen is the best way to do it. That's how I got my girlfriend. She was my best friend and we ended up falling for each other without trying and it turned out to be the most amazing thing ever. So maybe don't focus so much on actively looking and just let life happen and you may be pleasantly surprised. That's the best advice I have. Good luck and think positive.

[MommaFrog]

I even have issues making IRL friends. People seem to just... not want to be around me, I don't know why.

I also have this problem thinking people are talking about me behind my back. Like, if I have a class with someone and talk to them in class. I feel like they talk abuot me ((in a bad way)) to their friends.

I'm not an unfreiendly person IRL. I am just like I am here...

[silverhalo]

I think online is definitely the way to go especially since im sure you said before that there are not many LGBT groups of anything near you.

[midwestgirl89]

You definitely do deserve love. It's hard to find a gf but that doesn't mean you aren't deserving of love. I understand where you're coming from completely though. And no, it's not too much to ask.

I know this is off topic but I think the most important thing is loving yourself for who you are. Give yourself some positive feedback about good qualities that you possess.

I'm not sure about where you find gfs but just know that you do deserve love and you will find someone! I agree that sometimes the internet is easier.

[redstormrising]

of course you deserve to find love, why wouldn't you? maybe you should give online dating a try. i did it maybe five or six years ago and didn't have a good time of it, but i (somewhat skeptically) decided to give it another go right after coming out and have had a much better time of it. it felt kind of strange at first, but it was kind of a "safe" way to get into the dating pool. you only have to reveal as much or as little of yourself as you want, and you can specify in your profile what kind of relationship you are looking for. that way, anyone who contacts you can be on the same page. i am sure there are women looking for the sort of interaction you described, so this may be a good way to connect with them.