omg is this for real!

[Danny19]

Hey guys I'm sort of excited.. ok really excited. So i met this guy online. We talked and he seems like an awesome guy. He told me that i fit what he is asking for. He was excited too, he even said its hard to believe. haha. Anyways he lives around 2-3 hours away from where i am. He said we should get to know each and invited me over. He lives on campus and said his roommate will be gone this weekend. So i agreed. I'm super nervous because I've never done this, I've hooked up. But i haven't done i guess you can call it a "Date". Since I'm free this whole weekend he asked if i wanted to go one day or spend the night. I kinda do wanna spend the night then i don't. He says it will be nice to cuddle together. and i love that but what if something else happens. will that be moving too fast? also any suggestions on what to do when i go visit him. i get nervous sleeping over at other peoples places too because i snore sometimes like randomly and its embarrassing.. so what do you guys think? any advice is appreciated

[parcimonieux]

It all depends. Are you looking for a serious partner, a lover, a weekend...? These things are universal. Sometimes it's hard to detach your immediate desire from your greater goals, but few options are necessarily wrong, you just need to take care of yourself and your partner, whatever their role is.

So, here is my advice: long distance relationships are fun, but near impossible to maintain unless you establish an openness that allows you both to be free when apart (caveat: this is my opinion, your mileage may vary). That being said, if you are into each other and you have the opportunity for a great time together, sexy or not, then take it. Be completely honest and open, and demand no less from him.

I can say from personal experience that I have some wonderful friends/lovers in remote places from me. We always wonder if our time together might escalate to more, but we're also entirely aware of where we are, physically and emotionally. So far, as long as we've keep all the reality in mind, it lets enjoy the time that we do have together.

Take all the joy you can get. Just be safe and be cautious but also be loving and eager. You never know what might happen.

-P

Other caveat: I'm in an uncharacteristically open and positive mood. Still, I re-read this and I think it's solid.

[Roland85]

He is most likely expecting sex. Nothing wrong with that, there are no rules for speed. You do what feels right. What you should ask yourself is whether you want to actually pursue anything meaningful with someone who lives so far away.

[Robert]

Go for it.

If you're not comfortable with sex, just say no.

He wont give a fuck about you snoring, he wants your dick.

Simples.

[Sunsetting]

how long have you talked with him and have talked with him on video chat?
i would want to know the dude before going to his place.

let someone know exactly where you're going and who you're with.

[Robert]

Originally Posted by Sunsetting

how long have you talked with him and have talked with him on video chat?
i would want to know the dude before going to his place.

let someone know exactly where you're going and who you're with.

Yeah, I agree with Sunsetting. If you havent Skyped him yet, I suggest you do.

[Lexington]

If you've hooked up before, presumably you know all the steps to take to ensure it'll be a safe one. (...right?) I'd say the steps are about the same. Meet him somewhere neutral first, like a coffee shop next to campus. Chat with him, see if you enjoy him in person as you do online. If anything feels "wrong", call it off. Tell him you don't feel comfortable with him, thank him for meeting with you, and go home.

If you feel fine with him, go ahead and head back to the dorm room with him. Feel free to do as much or as little as you'd like with him the first night. (If you think anal might be in the forecast, make sure you bring your own condoms and lube.) You might warn him a bit that you snore, but other than that, have a good time.

Lex

[Danny19]

so just to update you guys. The next day he told me he wanted to think about it a bit more. I was okay with that. Then he started confusing me about what he wanted. So i messaged him and i told him i liked talking to him and i would like to get to know him better. and he didn't respond. So yesterday i messaged him one more time and told him that if he didn't want to talk anymore it was ok but i wish he would tell me instead of ignoring me... long story short i didn't go, i got excited for nothing, and he is a pussy asshole. lol. i wish he would have grown some balls to tell me he didn't want to talk anymore than just ignoring me... it all seemed to good to be true anyways..oh well moving on -_-

so by looking at my quote down here. it wasn't meant to be lol

[jsmurf]

Dont worry Danny19... there's always another bus. Take it from a virgin 4 years your senior.

What i would do to be 19 again.

[insidehappy]

thanks danny 19 for sharing. personally he sounds like a whore and some other booty call probably came up. you saved yourself trouble and possibly and std. good thing it didnt' work out. i mean, who is really asking someone they never met to sleep over that soon.....SEX. he's a slut.

[Koll]

Hmm.


Sounds like you got a booty call, bud.. hah.

[Sunsetting]

It's interesting how simply asking to get to know a person can reveal their true intentions. I'm glad you took the absolute right steps. You are an ace!

[Danny19]

haha thanks for the responses guys

oh well he is an idiot. he made it seem like he wanted something for real. but I'm over it. moving on.

anyways hows life you guys? lol