Will this just keep getting harder? - Empty Closets - A safe online community for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered people coming out

Tiny Catastrophe · 1st Feb 2012, 10:59 AM

I've already seen how difficult it can be to be gay as far as how people treat and look at me (including my own family). I feel like it's just going to get worse when I get older. Like my girlfriend and I plan on getting married and having kids like any other couple but I feel like society won't take us seriously or give us trouble for that. I feel like it will forever be a struggle to live a happy life. My question is, does it get any easier when you get older in terms of the way people treat you and things like that?

djstcktn326 · 1st Feb 2012, 12:35 PM

Hi there Tiny.

Well the way this can get easier is if you believe that it will get easier. I know it might be easier said than done but sometimes you have to see the good things in your life and say "This is why my life is good." Or you can say "I don't like this about my life, let me try to change it." Basically only way it's going to get harder is when you stop believing that it will get better. Just try getting in the morning and saying "Today is going to be a good day." You control how you live your, you set your own destiny. And don't about the things you can't control. They'll work themselves out. I really hope this helped.

Chouchou · 1st Feb 2012, 01:03 PM

I sincerely believe that, given the direction that society is headed in the US, life will get better as time goes on and more Americans support equal rights for LGBT folks.

Most of your future happiness will depend the approach you and your girlfriend take to life. You can choose to let the constant worries about safety and discrimination affect your daily lives, or you can take control and not let the worries prevent you from doing what makes you happy. Who knows, maybe the simple acts of you and your girlfriend going out shopping or strolling in the park with the kids--just like any other family--will change some hearts and minds.

Tiny Catastrophe · 2nd Feb 2012, 01:56 AM

Thanks guys. My girlfriend is right now the one who's more "Yeah I'm gay and I really don't give a shit what you think." I on the other hand am only comfortable being out to some friends and my mom's friend (because he's gay). My girlfriend has been out longer than me so I guess the longer I'm out the more I'll get used to it? I don't know lol. Thanks for the advice

1st Feb 2012, 10:59 AM	#1
Tiny Catastrophe Love is genderless <3 Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: Lesbian Out Status: 2 sisters, mom, friends, school Location: New Yorkish Age: 19 Posts: 863 Join Date: Jun 2009	Will this just keep getting harder? I've already seen how difficult it can be to be gay as far as how people treat and look at me (including my own family). I feel like it's just going to get worse when I get older. Like my girlfriend and I plan on getting married and having kids like any other couple but I feel like society won't take us seriously or give us trouble for that. I feel like it will forever be a struggle to live a happy life. My question is, does it get any easier when you get older in terms of the way people treat you and things like that? __________________ Sometimes pain becomes such a huge part of your life that you expect it to always be there. Because you cant remember a time in your life when it wasnt but then one day you feel something else. Something that feels wrong, only because its so unfamiliar. Then in that moment you realize you're happy.

1st Feb 2012, 12:35 PM	#2
djstcktn326 Well Known Full Member Gender: Very very very very feminine man. <3 Orientation: Gay Out Status: Some people Location: Maryland Age: 20 Posts: 107 Join Date: Oct 2011	Re: Will this just keep getting harder? Hi there Tiny. Well the way this can get easier is if you believe that it will get easier. I know it might be easier said than done but sometimes you have to see the good things in your life and say "This is why my life is good." Or you can say "I don't like this about my life, let me try to change it." Basically only way it's going to get harder is when you stop believing that it will get better. Just try getting in the morning and saying "Today is going to be a good day." You control how you live your, you set your own destiny. And don't about the things you can't control. They'll work themselves out. I really hope this helped. __________________ No matter how bad the world gets, always keep a beautiful smile on your face.

1st Feb 2012, 01:03 PM	#3
Chouchou Warrior Goddess Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: Homosexual (asexual?) and mostly homoromantic Out Status: To some friends, but not to family Location: Wisconsin, USA Age: 26 Posts: 1,109 Join Date: Oct 2011	Re: Will this just keep getting harder? I sincerely believe that, given the direction that society is headed in the US, life will get better as time goes on and more Americans support equal rights for LGBT folks. Most of your future happiness will depend the approach you and your girlfriend take to life. You can choose to let the constant worries about safety and discrimination affect your daily lives, or you can take control and not let the worries prevent you from doing what makes you happy. Who knows, maybe the simple acts of you and your girlfriend going out shopping or strolling in the park with the kids--just like any other family--will change some hearts and minds. __________________ "The good neighbor looks beyond the external accidents and discerns those inner qualities that make all men human and, therefore, brothers." -- Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

2nd Feb 2012, 01:56 AM	#4
Tiny Catastrophe Love is genderless <3 Full Member Gender: Female Orientation: Lesbian Out Status: 2 sisters, mom, friends, school Location: New Yorkish Age: 19 Posts: 863 Join Date: Jun 2009	Re: Will this just keep getting harder? Thanks guys. My girlfriend is right now the one who's more "Yeah I'm gay and I really don't give a shit what you think." I on the other hand am only comfortable being out to some friends and my mom's friend (because he's gay). My girlfriend has been out longer than me so I guess the longer I'm out the more I'll get used to it? I don't know lol. Thanks for the advice __________________ Sometimes pain becomes such a huge part of your life that you expect it to always be there. Because you cant remember a time in your life when it wasnt but then one day you feel something else. Something that feels wrong, only because its so unfamiliar. Then in that moment you realize you're happy.

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