Hi My name is Solaris (Not my real name). I am a 30 something woman from Australia. I grew up in a big city and have attended church all my life. I am an ex-homophobe converted to homosexuality. I tend to talk too, much, I tend to overshare and I will probably write many boring and thesis length posts. I have told two people I am gay and they are concerned I am going through a phase. If my mother was alive I would have called her up and told her about it. She had been asking me was I gay for years. I cannot believe I am a lesbian, but I am really happy with how my feelings have developed over the issue. So here are my thoughts. 1. Many at the people at my church who are out as gay are undergoing therapy or just accept they are gay and must be celibate. However, I am realising I don't want to be made straight or remain celibate for the rest of my life. I really really like being queer. I am normally a loud, colourful and outrageous and stood out in my church in contrast to the gentle and kind ladies who usually go there. 2. My views and passions are changing everywhere. I cannot oppose gay marriage anymore. My opposition was always weak, but that was because I identified with GLBT. For some bizarre reason I am more likely to support left wing causes. 3. Realising I am gay is the best feeling I came over me (I think I had an orgasm). I feel my soul has been completed. My feelings about women are normal and I no longer will need to worry about the need to try and be heterosexual. I had two women ask me out over the last couple of months. Maybe I was giving off something that I didn't know about that told them. I am disappointed I said no. If there is a next time, I am going to say yes and enjoy going out on a date with another woman.
