Greetings all. First, I can't resist.(!) There we go. That banana was my phone background for a while until I got a new phone. Except, it changed between a dancing pepper, carrot, and banana. It was fantastic. So... On here, I go by Flyte. The 4 in the username is just because Ilike numbers. Especially perfect squares. I have odd rules for which numbers bother me and which don't. And yes, I have a mild form of OCD which doesn't really count as OCD because it doesn't really drive me to keep things in a certain way. For instance. The number six irritates me, but I can deal wiht it easily in the same way that one might deal with a bug bite. I'llgo ahead and take the opportunity to say please ddon't judge my typing. The tablet I tend to use is fond of correcting real words to non-words without my noticing. Well then. I'm a girl, a junior in high school, and a general nutball. My two siblings are relatively normal. My younger sister is athletic, pretty, and number one in her class. My little brother is an actor, a karate kid, and a comedian. I'm not fond of athletics, though I do play tennis, a baker, a cook, and an artist. Also, I'm a non-judgemental vegetarian, an atheist, on meds for clinical depression, and potentially lesbian. I'm not sure. I do know I hate being touched by guys. I don't want to kiss a guy. The thought of being physically or emotionally intimate with a guy makes my skin crawl, but I do find some guys attractive. Tom Hiddleston as Loki, for instance. Very physically attractive. But I don't particularly like the idea of a relationship with him. I have only been in a relationship once, and it was with a guy. It was neat and exciting at first, because, wow, highschool is the time to find a boyfriend! According to most TV shows and from what I'd gathered listening to my parents reminiss. But within a month, he kissed me, and I wanted to throw up. I avoided touch, even making up that I had a skin condition that I was going to the dermatologist to have checked out. But I'm fine, with touching my female friends. I like hugs and holding hands and having them sit in my lap when they're girls, but I tend to be more distant from the guys. Actually, after third grade, all of my ffriendships with guys fell apart. I ddon't know if its because Ijust like girls better, or if iIhave trust issues, or if its just a weird period of my life, but I'm questioning my sexuality big time. Its weird, because even though my mom really seems to get it and supports me in my questioning, but I definitely have to hide it from my dad. He doesn't exactly approve of homosexuality. I mean, he's accepting in the same way that a rooster is accepting of another, so long as they're far, far away from each other. So yeah. There we go. (!)
Welcome! This is a good place to find answers to your questions. I find I learned a lot just reading other people's stories and experiences. You might try looking up the Kinsey scale to see if you may be bi or gay (or something else). It's good your mom is supportive, and in time if you figure things out, she will be a great advocate for your dad. I know right now he's not accepting, but that's because he is not close to any gay people, so he probably has never had to really deal with his [ignorant] beliefs. Also, some parents go through a grief process (grief over you not being straight), which can include anger and denial.
Yeah, I'm intending not to talk to him until I have a girlfriend, which I don't really forsee for a while, since highschool is enough stress without bringing relationships into the mix. I'm just worried because so far she's actually lied to him once about the first time we talked, since it was in private, and my dad didn't know what we were saying. She told him we were talking about me questioning whether or not I was christian, which is not totally a lie, but it feels bad making my mom lie to my dad for me.