I'm the kind of girl that is afraid to be different. When I was younger I always tried to force myself into believing that I was going to be the typical wife when I grew up. I would have tons of children and marry a handsome successful man. I convinced myself that this is what I wanted for years upon years until one day I finally had enough. The strange thing is although I've fell in love with girls I was still in denial of being a lesbian for the longest time. I just recently began on the path of self-acceptance. I'm a long way away from telling my family though. Even thinking about it terrifies me. I live with my grandfather and that is all and he is a very homophobic man. His daughter which I guess is my aunt although we aren't related by blood is bisexual. My grandfather hasn't spoken to her in nearly a year now. She's getting married in a few months and he doesn't even want to attend the wedding. My grandfather grew up in a very strict Catholic home and so did many of my other family members. I fear the same fate as my aunt if I choose to come out now. I can't even fathom the consequences especially considering even just my aunt being bi repulses my grandfather. Imagine him finding out that I'm totally gay. He would more then likely flip out. I don't have many friends to talk to so I just really needed a place to meet people that wouldn't judge me. What I feel like I need at the moment is someone to help me through my path of self-acceptance so I can get to the point where I no longer fear being gay. I fear it a lot less then I did in the past but I'm not 100 percent accepting of myself yet. I would ideally like to come out to my family before I graduate high school but if that can't happen then so be it. I'm done hiding in the shadows and I'm finally ready to ask for the help that I've needed for way to long.
Welcome. I understand about grandparents. One of the reasons I didnt come out until i was 26 was because of my grandmother. Who from the time i was born was planning my wedding to a good ole church boy. Im here if you need to talk. just message me and I will be here listen and bounce ideas. I hope you find what you need here.
Hey, welcome to our community. I hope that you come out soon, it will be easier on you, but don't do it until you are financially independent from your family. I'm sorry that they are so bad, but what's really important is not them accepting you, but you accepting yourself.
Thank you so much! I'm happy that I'm not the only one out there that seems to be going through this kind of thing.
Welcome! I also have been in the closet so long because my family is pretty conservative (most are Catholic). Only now that I became financially (and physically) independent have I seriously thought about coming out. My advice is just to remember that even if it seems impossible, you need to remember your grandfather's approval should not stand in the way of your happiness. I suggest at least talking with your closest friends first, so you can have a strong support group besides your family.
Trust me you are not alone. Never think that. There are sadly tons of us like this. I will say that once i came out it was like a weight was lifted off me.
