Hi, my name is kelvin, 22, from a small town in Indonesia called Medan. I've been searching for an online LGBT community for a while and EC is the one I've been looking for. I'm hoping to learn and share experience with people out here, so hello to everyone Short story : Well, I like boys since as young as I can remember and I knew I was different and I accepted myself long time ago, but I'm closeted. When I was a kid, my dad always told me to man up and I didn't understand back then (I do now), I guess because I was girlish. I didn't want him to yell at me all the time so I managed to act like what he wanted me to; boyish. Now I'm a straight act gay. Growing up as gay is hard and living in a traditional small town makes it even harder. It is a whole different world I'm living here. LGBT is a taboo topic to discuss. They made fun and talked about how wrong and disgusting it is. I talked, listened, and learned from a lot of people and few of them are pretty cool with LGBT people but most of them are not. I'm out to my sister and 3 of my good friends. They accepted me for who I am, but they don't really understand me because this is new for them. There is no LGBT community here, so no one to talk and connect with. Thats the reason I joined EC I'm looking forward to connect with new friends, so message me anytime, I would love to hear from you guys!
Hello Kelvin! Sorry about your parents, but I'm glad your sister and friends are accepting. You just have to explain to them that your sexuality is not a choice. Try asking them if they ever remember choosing to be straight. Have you thought about moving to a big city? That may be good in the long term to escape the pressure of your town.
Welcome to EC. I'm sure you find here friends and I wish you to be happy in your place. Your sister and friends need time to understand you.
Hello aaron82 & happydavid. Thanks resu for your concern. It would be a dream come true if I were to leave this hell hole, but moving out to a big city is not an option for me right now, because I'm oblige to help my dad's metal workshop. This is where I felt stuck. As I said before, it's a different world I'm living here, most of us don't get to leave after graduation. My parents wont let me go to the college in big city because they 'need' me here. I fought for it but I lost eventually because they paid for my college, alas I stayed. I live with my parents and that is a normal thing here. People still live with their parents even though they're married. It's like you can't get away from them, shackles for life. But I still believe there's a way for me to leave this place, and I'd love to live in America or any other gay friendly country
You might first try to save some money up so you can move. In the meantime, try to do what you can to make your current situation better. It's best if you can find some LGBT support group. A national one is here: GAYa NUSANTARA
