I'm new here, and I don't quite know what I'm doing. It's 3:25 in the morning, and I can't sleep. School starts again Monday, and I'm already stressing myself out because of it. Last year I discovered I was bisexual, but I still have yet too come out to anyone, save my sister and a handful of close friends.Before, I always accepted that I was a cis female. Now I'm questioning what I've been told since the day I was born. I'm not going to claim that I'm not like other girls (because what the :***: is wrong with other girls) But lately I've been really off and on with how feminine I am. One day I want to put on red lipstick and green eyeshadow and wear a cute dress, but the next day I want nothing more than to wear jeans and an ill-fitting tee-shirt. But its more than just that. Some days my entire behavior changes, usually in time with outfit changes. I'm beginning to get the feeling that I'm genderfluid. I still don't know yet. I may just be demigirl. Still, I'd like some advice from someone with a bit more knowledge. Is there anything else I might be?
Hello Hela, welcome to EC. Don't stress yourself trying to put a label or to fit a label. Just do what you want as long as you don't harm yourself or others. Society created boxes want to fit all in these boxes and forgot the uniqueness of each individual. Your are beautiful what ever you wear don't listen to people who says otherwise, do what you feel right for you. You still a teenager and you can't figure it all now you are still developing. so take it day by day.
Thanks for the advice! I honestly didn't expect a reply, especially one so quick. But you're right. I don't really need a label to be myself. All I know right now is that some part of me is female. The other part is what confuses me. Maybe an attempt at sleep will help. I'll see what tomorrow brings, and go from there.
Hi Hela. Welcome to the EC, I must say! From my perspective - you seem like a genderfluid but I may be wrong because I don't know the full details and I don't need to because you don't have to label yourself as you can wear whatever you'd like. Hope it helped a bit!
Thanks for the advice. Today was a bit more of a masculine day, and I tried to dress accordingly, but my mom saw what I was wearing and made me change. That has certainly led to a less-than-stellar day. I really am starting to get the feeling that I am gender fluid. The only problem for me is that its really difficult to look and dress masculine. For feminine days I'm fine, but my more masculine days leave me really unhappy. I own next to nothing that is masculine, due to the fact that my mom refuses to buy me anything other than what she deems is meant for girls. I have a few unisex shirts that make it a bit better, but given that I have long hair, a very feminine face and build, I can never really get to that masculine side. Does anyone have any tips? I did find n awesome camisole binding tutorial, but there's no way I can even pull that off around my family. Any tips?
Can you tell your mom, if she asks, that the binder is for sports/PE? that you like the snug feeling? As for the masculine clothes, can you show her some celebrities in a similar style to what you're interested in and say you want to try different styles out before you decide what suits you best? Remind her you're only 14 and what you're doing today is not what you'll always be doing. Does she look the same today as she did at 14? Also. These are clothes not drugs, parents! Sorry, lost my cool for a minute. Good luck!
You don't have to rush into making decisions on where you fit in this world, this website is here to provide the support and guidance you need to find yourself and find happiness. Welcome, I'm sure you'll love it here. (Also, I can totally relate with the school and sleep thing. How can I sleep when I procrastinated on schoolwork? I've probably gotten only a couple hours of sleep these past couple days lol)
Thanks for all the great advice! School starts again tomorrow, so I might be able to get away with more than when I'm cooped up at home with my family. Also, being with my friends will really help my mental health. I have been able to find a good outfit for tomorrow at least. (if its a masculine day) I still don't pass as anything close to masculine, but I can try. If my disphoria is real bad, I can always bind in the school bathrooms, and take it off before I go home. Hopefully now I'll be able to squeeze in a few hours of Sleep. Thanks again for all the help!
Hello Hella, how do you feel today? For the masculine day you can still have a pretty face and long hair, just check the Chinese ancient warriors. And if you like my daughter watch Korean drama their men are beautiful like feminine beauty. It let me think if I married a feminine man I properly be straight
Hello! Today was more of a feminine day for me, so I didn't really have any dysphoria. School still sucks, but I think I rocked the dress I was wearing. Even if it was freezing today. Thanks for the support, everyone. I joined this sight without expecting very much, but the overwhelming support has made the last few days a bit easier. I've always felt as if my gender wasn't valid, even when I started to think I was genderfluid, because I have never really looked masculine. All the advice I've received is helping with that. So, again, thank you.
