I think I'm a... lesbian..

Omg. this is kinda hard to type.. but here goes nothing. OK first of all, My name is Raven and I'm a 16 yo girl.

Sup Raven? :smilewave

Only a few weeks ago I was watching Glee for the second time (lol) and I noticed that I was checking out the girls instead of the guys. My first thought was " oh crap.. what am I doing? could I be gay!?" And I just pushed that thought to the side and continued watching. (I don't have anything against gays, i actually ship gay guy couples on TV harrrd XD) anyway, a day or so later I caught myself checking out the girls again.. and that's when I really started to question myself.

There are plenty of people on here who are questioning their sexuality in some shape or form, so you're not alone on that one. (*hug*)

For the record, my whole life i was 100% sure that I was straight. I didn't even know people could be gay until i was old enough to watch reality TV lol, and I always only had guy crushes until.. the end of last year. I didn't realize it, but I had a crush on one of my girl friends.

I've never really had crushes on guys before, there was this one time I thought I might be into this guy but the thought of kissing him made my want to throw up. So I guess not. :lol: Is it possible you could be bisexual? I mean you're the only one who can define your own sexuality here. I always assumed I was straight because most people are, so it makes sense that I would presume myself to be in the majority. I was really shocked when I had my first crush on a girl.

I had a boyfriend once.. (long distance) and we're still friends now.. but during the relationship I never felt.. like I really liked him that way.. i always felt like we would be better as friends. I mean, i know long distance relationships never work but.. still. When we were together, I had maybe.. 2 or 3 fantasies about us kissing but.. that was it, and after that my guy fantasies pretty much faded. (we were only together for 5 months)

I went out with a guy once but I never really felt that way either. I never had any fantasies about kissing him though, I tried to get myself to kiss him once because that's what "normal couples" do but I kept putting it off because I didn't want to. I've tried to give myself "guy fantasies" before in the past but it's never worked for me. I was with him for about 2 or more years and we didn't even kiss. When I finally came out to him he was accepting though, and actually came out to me as Bi but leaning more towards guys. These days we're still close friends.

TMI below
Lately I've been having frequent sexual fantasies of girls.. and it turns me on. *blegh* XD and i was taking this sexuality quiz that was asking me about "eating out a women" and "giving head to a man" so i googled it... oh LORD. I looked up the eating thing and i didn't read all of it but i was imagining 2 girls and i was super turned on. BLEGH XD then i looked up the giving head to a man thing and i was completely turned off.. LOL. so that was the biggest sign for me.

Why "blegh"? Sexuality quizzes aren't a great source for figuring out your sexuality. They are often based on stereotypes, false perceptions and sometimes bias. It seems clear to me that you at least have some interest in women, although the act itself for the man thing may have been the reason you were turned off and of course there's always asexuality.

I am still attracted to guys.. well, there faces.. and their bodies are... meh but i dont have as much of a desire to kiss them as i do for girls. and i think girls are a lot sexier than guys.

Is it possible you could be bi/pansexual but with a preference for girls? Although like I said before, you're the only one who can define your sexuality. If you even want to define yourself at all. Although you can find someone attractive but not be attracted to them. If that makes any sense.

ONE MORE THING! I think my family might be homophobic. Examples: My parents think its sad how some gay guys have high voices, and they hate when guys wear makeup... and my sister thinks that people choose they're sexuality -_-. My grandma said that if she saw 2 guys kiss that she would puke. It's not because of religion, they just think it's gross and they don't understand it. I don't think my parents would kick me out or anything if i came out.. but idk how they would feel about it.

My parents are generally accepting (haven't told them yet though) but they say things like "there are too many gay men on TV/ too many gay comedians/presenters" or "I don't like her because she's too butch/he's too camp" but they're getting better. They don't freak out when two girls kiss anymore. I do hate getting comments like "you'll have to find a short guy to date you" (I'm tall) "I can't wait until you have a boyfriend/get married" or "I can't wait until you have a boyfriend and a bunch of cats together" and "when you get pregnant" off people. They did ask about my sexuality once, but since I didn't say anything they presume I'm straight. I just got scared, that's why I didn't respond.

So anyways.. that's what's going through my mind.. :eusa_clap hope it wasn't too.. scattered. Have any thoughts/advice? I would really appreciate it!

Probably less scattered than my mind is. But yeah these are just my thoughts on the topic. (!)

 

Hello!

 

Hi

 

Welcome.

 

Hey! Don't stress yourself out over it. If you've always assumed that you were straight before this, then you might just be bi, or biromantic homosexual (like me!) where you're bi, but like the opposite sex only romantically.

 

I thought I was gay but I believe I am actually bi. I originally came out as bi at age 17 but had too many uncertainties back then. When I entered the gay community at age 18 or 19 I met other gay men who told me that I was probably gay and not bi. So for 15 years I have identified as gay but had a lot of doubts about it. I turned 35 a few weeks ago and for the past several months I have been having sexual urges for women and I especially like watching two women just like I do two men. For years I have wondered what it would be like to be a woman and be with a woman.

 

Thank u for all your thoughts! <3 (this is my other account) This site has really helped me out with the confusion and atm I'm pretty sure i'm a bi-romantic homosexual

- Raven

 

I have often felt cock invy and wanted to be a male or- even better- a hermaphrodite...I have always enjoyed men, but have occasionally felt drawn to a woman. Find both sexes (trans or otherwise) to be apealing. Just haven't found any local fems interested or out, guess. Men are more drawn to my big ass than females. I crave a woman at times even though I have a man. The relationships are very different... It's healthy and natural to question things after awhile. Especially if you didn't have much experience before coming out as you did. It happens often.

*hugs all*(*hug*)