Hi everyone I've known for several years now that I'm transgender. I was born a male but I've always know that I'm female(I'm a women in a man's body). I havent told anyone about this cause I'm ashamed.This is the first time I'm talking about this so y'all are the only people you know. I'm more of a woman than a man physically & emotionally. I've got long eyelashes ( not fake lashes its all natural) small hands,small butt :icon_red small feet & I have a small frame. And I think more like a woman than a man & I'm very sensitive & emotional so I'm more feminine. The thing is even though "I'm a woman in a mans body" I dont wanna be a woman!! So I'm not willing to go through the sex change & to even dress like a woman even thought I know Im transgender. I want to live me life as a straight male but it feels like I'm living a lie & I'm not being who I really am. It feels like the right thing to do is to become a woman cause thats who I truly am but I dont want to so what am I supposed to do?? I also feel thats the reason why I've failed & been rejected by many women & my sex life is non existant cause maybe girls sense that I'm not a "real man" or that I'm gay?? They say God has creatd that special someone for eacho one of us but if I'm really a female not a male does that mean that my special someone is a man not a women?? My fear is that my special someone is NOT a girl so I'm never gonna find a girlfriend if I pretend & live my life a s a straight male?? I kinda believe in destiny & fate so is it my destiny to become a woman & get married to a man even if I dont want to?? Is it possible to date & have sex with women & find true love with a woman if you're really a woman ( transgender MTF)?? I've heard about celebrities such as Bruce Jenner & Frank Maloney who only come out at the age of 50-60 & they lived half their life as a straight male & were married & divorced with 3 different wives. Its just when I talk to girls they dont seem interested in me cause maybe I'm not masculine enough & maybe they can tell I'm not a real man or that I'm gay?? They say you shouldnt look for love, love will find you but if you're not meant to meet a woman but you're meant to meet a man cause you're transgender than I'm never gonna meet my future wife cause I'm meant to be a woman?? Sorry about the long post but what do you think I should do ?? Do I have ot go through with the sex change or is it possible for me to live my life as a straight male & to find a truel ove/future wife?? I havnet told my friends or family about this should I??
I'm not transgender myself so I'm not the most knowledgeable in this regard, but I think if you don't want to have a sex change then you shouldn't get it. But why don't you want to? Is it because you're afraid or because you're fine with having the body you have now? Either way, that's up to you. Also, just because you are a woman doesn't mean you have to fall in love with a man and not a woman. You can be a woman and have any sexuality, meaning you could like men, women, any gender, or all genders. Who you can love has nothing to do with your gender. If you are attracted to women, then that's the way you are and that's perfectly okay. If you are attracted to men, then that's okay too, but you don't have to be just because you are more of a woman yourself. I hope this helps. And you came to the right website for this! There are lots of great people on here who are like you and who can answer your questions!
Welcome to the forum! It sounds like you're going through a lot. The first thing that I suggest is that you start a new thread (exactly like this one) in the Gender Identity and Expression sub-forum. You'll get a lot more views there, and hopefully some helpful advice for your situation.
I agree, everyone at the gender subforum will help you out a lot And something to keep in mind is that gender idenity and gender expression are different things. There are trans females who present as fully masculine, beard and all. That doesn't mean they are any "less trans"
Hmmm being transgender isnt a choice so that is ok to fell like that i suggest you look up non-binary genders
Thank you all for your responses & making me feel welcome. It was probably the wrong place to post this thread so I'll repost it on the Gender Identity and Expression sub-forum
