Hey everyone! So, since I am new here, I guess this is my little intro. :icon_wink I am a 34 yr old woman & married to my HS 'sweetheart' (if you even want to call it that). He was introduced to me by a friend way back when. We also have a 14 year old daughter. Anyways...Fast forward 18 yrs: We separated a few weeks ago. I have struggled with my sexuality for over 20 years. Yes. 20 long years. I have always preferred women (dated one briefly when I was 18/19 during one of me & the hubs many breakups) and would generally push those feelings/thoughts aside or bury them and just tell myself it wasn't anything, I was being weird. When I dated other guys, I'd pretend in my head that they were women (TMI, but hey, it is what it is). I have also always found most men, well, gross. lol. My hubs was the only guy I could ever tolerate, trust (took many years) and love. We were best friends. Got married when my daughter was 3 (despite my objections, had family pressure, etc). Well, like I said we separated a few weeks ago. I just can't do it anymore. Not only have we both grown apart in the most polar opposite ways, but I am just not interested sexually (haven't actually 'done the deed' in well over a year, sorry, more TMI). Not that he does anything wrong, I just can't anymore. I feel like I am going through some kind of mid life crisis. :icon_sad: Suppressing how I really feel for all these years has taken it's toll on me. It's funny because people have always made stupid comments to me about being secretly lesbian, or joke about the fact that I'm somewhat of a tomboy & 'wear the pants' in my marriage (then they'd ask, you sure you aren't really gay? ::insert stupid laughter here: Now that I have moved out I feel like part of this huge weight has lifted. Haven't fully 'come out' to anyone but myself and 2 others yet, but I am not in a hurry. I know my parents will be fine with whatever, they are very open minded, accepting people (thank goodness). Anyways, that's the extremely short version of what's going on with me, who I am, etc! Feel free to ask any questions or reach out to me about whatever! Thanks for listening, take care y'all!! :icon_bigg
Welcome to the forum! Wow, it sounds like you've been through a lot. Take a look around the forum, and feel free to start a new thread in one of the support sub-forums - I think you'll find a lot of people have been through the same, if not similar, situations!