Hi, My name is Terry and I am a 57 year old gay man who have lived behind a lie all my life. The lie allowed me to have had two girlfriends, and I married them both, the last lasting 25 years. The lie started at school. It had only been a year since Homosexuality had been decriminalize in the UK. *Society had move on...but that it didn't stop the school yard bulling. I still remember all the words now..... and “gay” was not one of them. I was always alone in a crowd - wanting to fit in without understand why I couldn't. School turned into work and as the child became the man, the normal life tragedies would follow, leaving me alone. The first one came within a period of morning and I clung to a life that was so different to mine and with hindsight now, knew it could not lasts. The second was more complicated and what was I believed to be a brief encounter with a stranger turned out to someone who was connected to my past... And a bond was formed. She was going though changes herself and her “rebound” to me gave me a new and exciting life. for many years to follow. A was my first. She was so prefect in every way. I cried whilst I held her in my arms believing that thee was no way she could grow up to be anything like me. 7 years ago, her friend was in trouble with the police and she was outed in frond of me as I was there to give her support. So proud of her and disgusted with myself, I knew it was only a question of time before I was going to have to do the same.; but as you get older, time moves a lot faster than you want. Things have now change. With years of living with a partner, a new man has entered her life. But I know, what you are is what you are. And the only way I can explain this to her is to come out first... I don't know how this story is going to end as I've planned to tell her, and everyone that means anything to me this Christmas.
Hi Terry and welcome to Empty Closets. We are here to help and offer support and it sounds like you might need it over the next few weeks as you face up to the prospect of coming out. I'm sure it feels very daunting after all of these years, but we have many people who have done exactly the same. Our Later in Life area might be a good place to seek support, advice and encouragement. Many of the members who post there will understand the difficulties you are facing. Don't go through it alone. We are here for you.
Hello Terry and a very warm welcome to Empty Closets! This forum provides a great service for help and support as it is very tough coming out and as Patrick said you will need as much advice you can get! I have been having feelings that I was bisexual for as long as I knew what love is but I was too scared to admit it to anyone until now and yet I have only told my brother, mom and dad. I can't tell the rest of the family and my school classmates as they are not very supporting. Hopefully it will be better for you.
