Good evening lovelies! Actually took me a little over an hour to muster up enough courage to make a post and now I hardly know what to even say .. ^^; I guess I'm here like many others, searching for a safe haven..maybe even a bit of strength. Fueled by my own insecurities and inability to rise up against and overcome the constant stream of negativity that surrounds the LGBT community, I've lost the person most important to me.. something that has left me floundering for my bearings like never before. This pain, however, has brought with it an entirely new clarity. It's something I refuse to let be in vain. With it in my belt I intend to finally fight back, because I've come to realize nothing anyone can say or do to me can ever top what I'm feeling right this second and it's something I never hope to experience again. I'm finally ready to live my life the way I've always wanted to and refuse to allow anyone other than myself have jurisdiction over my life. I hope I can find in this community a small push forward on those days where a little uplift is needed and hope we can all build each other up. I look forward to interacting with you guys!
Welcome, NiaJ . . . I just joined this site today. It's taken decades literally. I am about to finish a memoir, not to be published, but for my family. The careful readers will see a pattern that evaded me until I started putting the episodes together. I am thrilled for you. You are young and have your life ahead of you. I am in my 70's and in pretty good health, I may get all this figured out yet. I was in a wonderful marriage to a woman for 40 years, and yet there was always something pulling at me. Friends and colleagues would say things like, "Let me introduce you to my lifestyle." I was always a bit curious as to what men saw in me that led to the numerous advances. Was I giving signals unknowingly. I guess I was never a "man's man" in that I didn't hunt or fish. I didn't speak of women disrespectfully. I am soft spoken. I enjoy classical movies. I love to put on dinner parties. Most of my best friends are women - gay and straight. My two best male friends have died. Both were straight. There were a number of incidents in my professional life in which I was labelled as gay. They were not positive attributions, but attempts to discredit me or get me fired. The best job for which I was interviewed was in the Bay area - San Rafael. The hiring community suddenly stopped communicating with me. My area director told his colleague in San Francisco, "the word around here is that he's gay." I am looking forward to being active on this site. Stuart
Hey, and welcome to EC. I know what that's like, the awkward first post: it took me a half-hour to come up with mine, as well, and I'm doing fine here. I think you'll fit in well here, too.
Hello there, and welcome to Empty Closets! I am sorry to read that you have lost someone who was an important part of your life; but it sounds like that you have used the experience to grow stronger and be yourself. Great to have you on board. I hope you will enjoy being part of the community.
Welcome to EC! Good to see that you are using something negative that happened in your life and turning it into something positive. Kudos to you because I struggle with that.
