Not sure what to say or do at this moment . Well here goes I guess ,Hi my name is well for now it is Polecat . I am 42 male I have two kids and a wife . I was attracted to guys all threw school and after school was over I stopped trying to meet any one for many many years then I met my wife and her 1 and half year old . Settled down had another child . I had a huge fight with my best friend of 30 years and all of a sudden all these old feelings came flooding in , I am no longer friends with him due to what he said anyway now I am this 42 year old man that has no idea what he is doing . I really do love my wife and kids but I have this huge feeling that I want to be with a man . When I see a guy that is really good looking I get a giggly and red in the face like a little school boy in grade school . I cant help but looking at guys, I did mess up and stepped out and had a evening with a young man ( I say young he was 32 ) anyway we had our fun and then two weeks later I am at the doctors office getting routine blood work done and never even dreamed anything was wrong .I found out two days later that I had gotten syphilis and I need to get treated ASAP . I did the treatments and was going to tell my wife when the nurse called her and told her she needed to be tested also . I feel horrible about what I did and thank god she did not get anything from me . This all happened march of 2015 . We are still together but it is really hard to be here . I do not know what to do I feel like I am loosing my mind .
Hi. I recommend going over to the Later In Life section, or the Family, Friends and Relationships section, or the Sexual and Romantic Attraction section (or all of them), and post a thread there about what you are feeling. Keep an open line with your wife rather than cheat.
Hi there, and welcome to Empty Closets! You have come to the right place to find support, and to write out your thoughts and feelings. As we go through life, we uncover different facets of what it means to be ourselves. I would encourage you to post in the LGBT Later in Life forum. There are a few members who have gone through similar experiences as you have, and sharing your experience and reading their responses might help you to start thinking about how you could move forward. Welcome aboard.
I want to thank you all for welcoming me and I will sure check out the LGBT later in life section . I am so confused right now I would stick my head in a bucket and bang it with a spoon if I thought it would help .
