So hello, I've just made an account (apologises for the text slang, I am typing on my phone) OK so I am bi, almost 100% sure, I know I am not straight for a fact. I was going to wait to fully come out (already out to all close friends) until I was in a another city at college. (Im in my early teens). But now I am looking at a program that will allow me to go into college when I reach the age of 15, but I will be living in dorms. So all that build up is basically just this, should I come out to my female roommate? If word happens to spread it may not cause great news for me because my grandparents on both sides of the family are extremely homophobic. This is going to sound awful as well but I was going to wait until they had passed away to come out too. So I'm a bit conflicted, I live out in the country so word travels fast, but really I'm tired of saying I have a crush on someone and everybody automatically asking who he is. I'm sorry this was so long! I did not intend for that to happen at all. Thank you for reading this all the way though (I hope) and any advice you send my way
Hi KitCat402, welcome to E.C! there is loads of information here to help with coming out, and an arcade! (always a bonus.) hope you find what you need
Welcome to EC, I hope some of the advice you find on here will be useful. I know what you mean about living somewhere isolated, where if one person knows- everyone knows, annoying as hell isn't it?
Hi! I've just joined too. I have lived the life of living in a female dorm and not coming out to my super religious roommate. I know that she would not have been comfortable if I had come out as bi or gender questioning, and I value our friendship quite a bit. So shoulda woulda coulda, would I have sacrificed our friendship if I had? There certainly isn't any right choice to that situation. Be that as it may, I wish I had taken that chance now because leaving all my friends from home meant leaving a huge part of my support system, so re-closeting myself with less support than I was used to was a huge mistake for my self esteem. On the topic of what gets back to your family: shit will happen in everyone's first year in college that nobody wants to admit to their family... chances are if you have a happy and social relationship with your roommate you guys are going to have to trust one another! Well thats about all I have to offer to you in answer, I wish you the best!
I was also pretty confused, but being an EC member, I have found a lot of support and help and cleared my head (mostly) from confusion. I'm sure you will love it here and I hope you find some helpful stuff!
I feel like you and your roommate should build a friendship first before you tell her any personal information about yourself. She is a stranger and that type of information is to heavy of an introduction, when you first meet someone. If you wait until you two are laughing and just focusing on becoming friends, then maybe once you do have that conversation with her, she will be comfortable enough to feel at ease with you because she will know you as a person. But for a stranger to bust out to another stranger that they are this or that. That might or might not make her uncomfortable. If she becomes uncomfortable, things could get difficult, especially if she spreads it around campus. You might get to know her and decide not to say nothing because of the type of person she shows you she is. Or she could be wonderful and you become life long friends. All I'm saying is be patient and just have fun and try and build a friendship first, to see what type of person she is. Good luck!!!!
