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Hey! Totally new at this!

Discussion in 'The Welcome Lounge' started by Sunny girl, Mar 11, 2017.

  1. Sunny girl

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    Hey guys! I'm new here and wanted to say hi! I'm 33 and recently realized that I'm a lesbian after getting involved with a woman. I am married with 3 children. My husband knows about the affair and so do many close friends. I'm in this contradicting place- I'm ecstatic and so at peace to be me (and surprised as this was nothing I never had insight into before) and feel a ton of guilt and shame and anxiety relating to how this will effect my family and other relationships. I have had about 9 months to process this myself but am now getting to a place where we are going to move forward with a separation and I'm feeling this roller coaster of readiness to tell everyone followed by fear of consequences of if all. I'm happy to have found this group as an outlet. :slight_smile:
     
  2. Worker Bee

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    Hey Sunny girl. Welcome to EC! All the stuff you are feeling is perfectly natural and I hope it all works out ok for you.

    I joined this site earlier in the week and I have found everyone to be really supportive.
     
  3. AnAtypicalGuy

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    Welcome to EC. There are several people around here who are or have been in a similar situation, I'm sure they'll be able to help you out or assure you when necessary.
     
  4. Moonsparkle

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    Hi Sunnygirl and Welcome!

    I can identify with what you are going through and so can a lot of people here on EC, so you will find support here! (Though in my case I was already divorced by the time I realized/uncovered the fact that I was a lesbian, so I didn't have that added component in my journey!)

    I understand how you are both feeling at peace AND worried about how this will affect your family, as well as fearing the consequences of it all.

    My therapist said something kind of simple to me several months but it's stuck with me and you may find it helpful to consider.

    He said, 'You really can't go wrong when you are honest about your feelings and who you are...no matter what the consequences.'

    I do believe there is some truth in that! Anyway, best of luck to you, and welcome to EC!
     
  5. Sunny girl

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    Thanks so much for the warm welcome! :slight_smile: It's nice to have people that get it. :slight_smile:
     
  6. dvxqnc

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    Welcome to EC

    There's a forum here called "LGBT Later in Life" that you might be interested in. I'm sure there are lots of other people in your situation.