Hi I'm new to this forum. I met a woman 30 years ago through my work and I completely fell in love with her. I never told her as I think she is straight. We lost contact but a week ago we met up and as soon as I saw her all the emotions came back and I realise I still love her after all this time. She told me that she had married and had 3 children and was separated from her husband whom she never loved. When she hugged me I didn't want to let her go. Should I tell her how I feel as I don't want to scare her off. I can't stop thinking about her.:dry:
Hey welcome to EC. I dont think you should neccessarily just blurt it all out straight away as depending on how she feels that might scare her off. Does she know you are gay? Also who got in touch with who and how did it come about after all that time?
Hi thanks for that. She joined my workplace 30 years ago for 2 weeks and then she went elsewhere. We lost touch, I changed my job and then last week she contacted my place of work to meet with someone else there. It broke my heart when she left all those years ago. We were touchy and always hugged me. She told me once that she missed me when she was a week away from me. It's very difficult to explain all this. Even as I text my heart is pounding thinking about her. I have never felt this way before or since for another woman
No I have never datedone a woman. I have been unhappily married for 17 years. She dosent know I'm gay. I know she has gay friends as I saw photos of her at a wedding. I know that if I told her how I felt and she felt the same I would be so happy. Is it unusual to love only one person. Ithe would've been easier for me if we hadn't met up. Do I say anything at all. I was going to contact her and ask to meet up
Yeah I think you should contact her and I think you should tell her either that you are gay, if she has gay friends then there is no reason why she should react badly to that. I think arranging a meet up is a good idea I think that way you can get to know her again and it will be easier to gauge how she might feel about you and whether she likes women herself.
I just want to know how to start the conversation. I'm sorry for all these questions but I want to do it right
Hey sorry wasnt really online last night. I think on the first meeting I would just play it quite cool, ask her whats been going on in her life in the last 30 years, hopefully she will ask about yours and you can tell her that you were in a marriage but it wasnt happy and now you identify as gay (which I am assuming you do as thats what your profile says). Hopefully when you disclose this information she will say oh I am also gay or bisexual, haha this is in an ideal world because that would at least show that you are in with a chance. Then I would probably start approching the subject by saying something like its so great to see you after all of this time and how you feel like you have such a great connection that you dont have with many other people. At least I think that is how I would go about it. What happens is largely based around how she responds and what she says.
Advice for other people is always easier than advice for yourself. I never said it will be easy...... I wish you luck.
Hi I have contacted her and asked if she will meet up with me at the weekend as I wanted to have a chat with her and that I should have had it 30 years ago. She isaid going to get back to me on it. I hope I have done the right thing.
