First Anniversary on EC

So today marks me being a member on EC for a year. I just want to say firstly how amazing this place is, I seriously don't know what I would be like if I hadn't joined. (&&&)

So, to commemorate this momentous occasion, I shall summarise what happened last year; Helen (Hln D) told me of this site and said I had to join. Now, to me, I didn't see the point of a hetro like me joining an GBLT community, what would I do? How could I relate to you guys? Would I even get accepted or would it just be awkward? It took a good fortnight plus a second friend and neighbour for seven years, Tom (tomfromeds), to persuade me to join, but I did it, one long and boring evening in September. I had a look around, customised my profile to the purple it is today, added a picture, wrote all the little bio and location bits, posted my only blog entry and vowed that I'd stay for two weeks then leave; at the time I really didn't see myself coming onto the site everyday to chat and relate and to advise other members.

I never left. I just couldn't.

The first post that made me change my mind was the intro thread Helen wrote for me, because I didn't want to draw attention to myself XD All the comments were 'Any friend of Helen's is a friend of ours', 'If you're Helen's friend then you must be cool.' 'We love straight people. ^.^' and so on. Now, if you know me, which I'm sure some of you do by now, I've never had the most happiest of childhoods. I never had many friends, got invited to less and less parties as I grew older, was generally more mature and socially strange compared to my peers. This wave of happy smiles and acceptance had me feeling so warm inside - I remember going to bed that night with a grin from ear to ear on my face.

For the first few weeks I just wondered about on all the sections, posting everywhere, slowly getting into the EC spirit of things. I applied to be a full member after three weeks of being a member, mainly because of hearing about the amazing place that is Chat. What I didn't realise at the time was that Helen, who by then was part of the mod team, read my application form. I was humiliated about this because I wrote some pretty soppy things, some about her XD

About a month or so after joining, I realised that although I wanted to offer advice and support, I couldn't do so really as some of things being posted about I couldn't, and never will, relate to. And when I could, my advice was mediocre at best or someone else has posted before me, so I just retreated to the more light-hearted sections, which is pretty much where you'll find me any given day of the week now.

So yes, I'm not very good member in the sense that I don't contribute well to the community, but I have gained a very important thing from EC; I have gained confidence. Not just general confidence externally in life and social interactions, but also internally too. I now smile a lot more and am generally more aware of how unsocial I could be at school and at home - the amount of negative and defensive body language I was giving off actually startled me! I also now believe what my parents tell me on a regular basis - that I'm beautiful, and it's thanks to you guys; Last year, I would look in the mirror to do my hair, brush my teeth and see my reflections in windows, and all I would see looking back was just a plain and average girl. Having put up a few pictures of myself, so many members commented that I was pretty, hot, stunning - the works. It all just started to sink in and I slowly began to see that yes, people do see me as attractive and that I'm not bland or just an eyesore (It also sort of helped that these comments not only came from the guys but also the ladies; if I could appeal to the whole length of the spectrum, all these comments had to be true, surely?)

So yes, for that particular reason, I want thank you people for making me a better person and making my evenings online just amazing; from the silly goings-on in the action-thread to the ridiculous conversations that happen in Chat, you guys have suddenly become a whole new world to me, full of friends, laughs and happy memories. As I opened with, I really can't see how I would have made it this far if I hadn't joined; I would still be a lonely and sad girl sitting by herself most of the day if it wasn't for you lovely people.

I really can't say enough how fantastic EC is and how much I've fallen in love with it and its members, I really can't. I hope you can understand my immense gratitude to you with all that drivel you've just read through, I honestly wish I could give each one of you a great big hug and kiss because you lot are my sunshine, even when it's pitch-black outside.

(*hug*) (*hug*) (!) (&&&) (!) (*hug*) (*hug*)

Oh, and this is my 1000th post so double celebration :eusa_danc