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[Congradulations] Life got better! [To EC]

Discussion in 'The Welcome Lounge' started by InaRut, May 28, 2010.

  1. InaRut

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    I was thinking last night about how much I'd had change between my graduation of highschool, first year university, and then my second year. It's hard to believe that I went from feeling like this lonely out-of-the-ordinary, in-the-closet "gay" kid to this almost fully confident, almost fully proud of himself man that I am today.

    There a few moments I hold special in my life. You know, the milestones that every person faces and surpasses in their life. I have milestones like graduation, chugging my first beer, hitting prestigue mode in Call of Duty (joking!). And then I have the milestones like, coming out of the closet to my brother, joining my first pride group, and finding EC. Surprisngly enough, I find the second group of milestones the most important.

    You see, things like Graduation, well that was a battle where I had a whole line of troops. Calvery was my family, always supporting me even when they thought I'd never make it to university. They were the ones who always become the powerhouse of these battles, always willing to rush the front lines. To do whatever had to be done to assure my victory.

    Teachers were like archers, sitting in the back lines. Some bad perhaps causing more harm then they did good, but then some really good...Always landing the arrow where it needed to hit.

    And my friends, they were my foot soldiers, when the calvery fell, and the archers were out of range, then I knew I still had the infantry to back me up.

    Education, pursuit of knowledge. That stuff was easy. However, a different battle would soon join my life. Sexuality...pursuit of identity, thats where I thought I'd fall. To reference lord of the rings, I was Helms Deep and life was an army of orcs.

    No longer did I have calvery. My once strong line of archers felt unfamilar to me in this new battleground, and my friends, the same way

    At first look, honestly, the battle seemed conquerable. But as the trials came into existance I knew I needed to find a new army.

    So, expierecing some of the darker moments of my life, I began to search. I was in an entirely new land, but I knew, if I searched hard enough I would find my army.

    Some sites I found were less constructive in my search for a new army. At least they helped me learn that, if I was infact gay, that people would find me attractive. As during this time in my life I was VERY insecure about how I looked.

    For a while there was a time where I prayed for another gay person to be my friend or to find a group that I could lean on for support when I needed them. Unconditional, un-biased care. It was then with EC that I realized my calvery had returned. With this small group, I could at least be a marauder. Conquering the little things at first. With EC, I finally realized that there was hope for a better, more open future.

    Because of EC, I found the courage to join my first pride group during university (and then because of this get to GO and MARCH in Toronto pride for the first time), I found the courage to say, "I'm gay" outloud...to another person! I found out how to love myself.

    First year, in university, I had one goal in my mind. Find a pride group, get some gay friends, and find confidence in my sexualtiy. One year later, in second year, I was that confident man I thought I'd never be.

    Now that I'm in Ottawa, I look at the battlefield and I see only but small skirmishes to conquer. I look behind me, and where only phantoms of dreams once existed there is now an even larger army then I had before. Old friends with new friends, and I'm sure that after my third year of school (In MONTREAL, OMG!) that any sorrow of my sexuality will be completely gone.

    SO congradulations EC! Here is another success story under your belt!

    P.S. There is VERY loud construction above my apt right now and it makes it VERY hard to be thoughtful and sentimental. :bang:
     
  2. Jim1454

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    Despite the construction your post was wonderful. As always.

    It's so good to hear from you again! EC really does transform lives. Yours and mine and countless others.