at age will I stop playing the game "am I, or am I not" lol almost 30years old and still struggle but I do know one thing. I am NOT fully straight...People have problems with people being BIsexual but not with people being gay or straigh..am I the only one that feels like this??
Well people *do* have a problem with people being gay, lol...but I understand what you mean. Bisexuals catch the short end of the stick from both sides. It seems sometimes that some straights view bisexuals as desperate or promiscuous, while some gays view bisexuals as either closeted homosexuals who are unwilling to admit it, or posers. Both groups often suspect bisexuals of infidelity, or assume that they're oversexed. But I see bisexuality as a major advantage as well - you literally have double the playing field of someone who chooses to date exclusively within one gender or the other. So it's not all bad.
If you are attracted to both sexes then you are attracted to both sexes, I know it can be difficult but your true friends wont care whether you call yourself gay, straight or bi they will just be your friend. We always want to label ourselves but sometimes its not possible. Do you mind if I ask how out you are?
Don't focus on having to choose. When I came out at first, it was more along the lines of telling people that I'm wasn't completely straight. But don't even focus on having to tell people. It was after I realized I had quite a crush on a male friend, when all the most recent crushes had been girls. So that time, I just said to myself, It's time to accept that this is serious, and explore this. It didn't mean I was ruling out anything with girls (though that hasn't happened).
Hey I just saw your other thread, sorry. I dont think you should worry about having a gay therapist. I think it is important for you to try and accept things in your own mind and then you will find the world around you far less scary and much more accepting.
Ok well if you dont feel comfortable with that therapist is it possible for you to change and see someone else, because it is important that you feel comfortable talking to your therapist. Can I ask what about having a gay therapist scares you? Dont feel you have to answer if you dont feel comfortable.
silverhalo..what scares me is that she might fall for me..and that scares me..99.9% it will NOT happend but I just scared...one day I told her that there is a risk or danger with her I don't remember which of those words I used. I don't think I can switch therapists its a evening progam 2.5hours in the eveing 5 days a week..I really don't have a problem talking to her when it's really important or its for a short period of time...I put that factor in the back on my mind but when I have our 45min 1on1 session I then to not want to talk and that is one factor as to why I don't I been only seeing her for almost 6months.
Its ok, I can sympathise, I was going to write I understand but that wouldnt entirely be true, I mean I havent experienced what your going through but when I was coming to terms with my sexuality and starting to come out I had lots and lots of irrational fears and even though logically I knew they were never going to happen it didnt stop me worrying about them. Would it help if before your 1 to 1 session you made a note of anything or the things you would like to discuss and then you could make sure you concentrated on these whilst in your session rather than on your fear?
that's a good idea..I do start off with an issue then the thought comes back to my head and i freeze up
Im glad I could be some help. It might also help if you decide on one or two things you possibly wish to discuss and then once you have done that finish the session keeping it quite brief, then maybe over time you can build up your confidence and the time of your session.
