So Im 35 and about 5 weeks ago I decided that yes Im gay...Ive told 4 people so far and i think I lost a brother, but at least I can look at myself in the mirror now and like myself. Ive had a crazy life and have done some insane things, but looking back me being gay isint the end of the world I always thought it would be......
Hi and welcome. Yeah some people don't like it. My brother in law banned me from his house so I can't even visit my sister (not that I like the as-hole anyway). So there will always be some idiots like that in families.
Came here looking to find stories more similar to mine. First post I read is yours coming out at 35. . Thanks for sharing. What was it that finally convinced you to do it?
Well Whoami It all started a month ago when my bestfirend killed himself. He was the type of person that you couldent really ever get to know. There was always a part that was hidden in him. And on my path to understand his death I stopped took a long look at myself and decided to stop lying to myself. You see I had hidden so well that even I had been convinced... Lame I know but that's what I was doing my whole life. I'm simplifying it but that's what started the prosses. So now I'm here trying to figure out what to do next.
Jaydog, Sorry to hear about your friend, that's terrible. I totally understand convincing everyone including yourself. I keep going back and forth between trying to accept internally, and desperate desire to just fit in and live the traditional dream life, wife kids and picket fences. But I think I know that's not the right path, but the other is still pretty scary to contemplate. On some level I wish I had figured this out sooner. Now comming out feels like really telling everyone I care about that I've been lying to them all this time in addition to all normal stress and fears. Hoping to get the inspiration from others to proceed on the right but scary path! Thanks again for sharing I hope you find what you need. Would love to keep in touch if you want someone to share, vent, or just chat.
lol I know exactly what you mean about the picket fences. that was always something i never wanted. My ex fiance just couldn't under stand why i never wanted to buy a house and "settle down". As far as telling people im realizing that you dont have to until your done figuring out whats in your head. hell in my life and the people ive known theirs at least 2 guys that will try to kick my ass. but hey im tough i can take it when im ready. the fear you feel is normal when ever your life goes through major transition. take your time! and remember life isn't a path its life. its messy and confusing but its what we got... ---------- Post added 25th Jun 2012 at 11:44 AM ---------- Oh and thank you all for the warm greetings!