I really have no idea what to say. I have recently decided to stop trying to ignore a major part of myself, and to live the way I feel I should. I've told only a couple of my friends, but I've always been anti-social and unable to talk to anyone else anymore. I'm just so tired of trying to be cheerful and look confident so that way my friends don't worry, but the truth is that I'm terrified by the implications of my decison to stop trying to be "normal". I'm terrified at losing my job and my family, and who knows what else. I'm sorry for just babbling on like this, I just have been holding it in for a long time with no one to really talk to.
