Hello forum. I found this site after doing some...personal research I guess? Hm. So...my story I guess. Its not quite as dramatic as others though...its in its early stages...so there definitely could be some drama in there in the future. I am 20 (for the next month =P) and I am a senior in college. I have plenty of friends who are in the LBGTQ spectrum and have always supported them. This past summer, boyfriend number two and I broke up. It was mutual and not very difficult, but then it dawned on me shortly after that I had a massive crush on my friend, who happened to be female (I am female assigned). Id always thought certain girls and women were attractive, but I'd never before had the urge to kiss one until she came along. I did tell her (it didnt seem right not to) and she was only supportive and flattered, but a bit saddened for me because she's straight. (Bummer right?) So I've sort of begun coming to terms with that...I don't know what I identify as but I'm pretty sure I'd no longer use "straight"...who knows? I figured I'd let that pan out and I'm happy with that plan. As for gender...thats new. I recently (in the past couple months) learned the term "gender fluid", and since then I have been sort of researching it, because nearly everything I have read points to that being what I am. I had never considered being anything but female and the concept is new, so I am very unsure what exactly I am. I do crossdress occasionally and get very irritated when I'm having a day where I feel more male, but my boobs are just too damn big and won't flatten out. I am definitely not trans* because I undoubtedly have days where I dress up girly and wear makeup and such, but there are other days where I feel like "holy crap why do I have boobs...why do I own makeup.." and its frustrating. I've now gone so far as to begin looking for a name to give my male side? My issue is I dont know if this is a comformity thing...I belong to the GSA at my college (largest club on campus XD) and have always been supportive of that community, but now I'm trying to figure out if I am bored being a straight cis-girl or if this really is me? Its an odd feeling, being unsure what you yourself are thinking. So...that's me. As I said before, I am working on a name that I like. For now I guess call me NI for my username. Thanks for reading!
Hi NI! Welcome to EC! We are glad to have you with us! ^_^ I identify as lesbian and still have days like that. LoL I think that's an interesting point... I wish I could give you a definite answer. There are a good number on EC who are genderfluid, so perhaps they can help you figure things out. Good luck!
Hello and Welcome!! I have days where I feel like this too. I don't own any makeup, but I do have days where I wonder why I have boobs. It really is frustrating.
Day by Day: that was kind of the hope I had! I would like to meet others with similar issues and figure out my own head. Thecat: thank you! and I own lots of makeup and I don't have a problem using it sometimes but there are days when Im like "why do i even have this?"
I have this issue all the time lol. I have a ton of make up and some day I just don't understand why lol. I look at it and shake my head lol Welcome to EC
