Well I guess an intro is in order first. Then to my need of help! My name is Cecil, I was born and raised in Los Angelis, Ca then I was transplanted to rural Texas. I only recently discovered that I had a label for my feeling and it is called being Bi!! I always thought it was due to the fact I was a fine artist and I had to stare at people in order to draw them XD So I am on the attempt stage of informing my parents that their little daughter (me) is not only Bisexual but possibly even Pansexual! The horrors!!!!! My friends know that I am bi but they either don't care, are bi themselves, or don't think I am serious since I don't date or drool whenever a good looking person passes our large network of nerds. I worry in that my parents (who I think will be accepting of my announcement) may end up suffering because of who I am. My aunts and uncles are set in their ways about sexuality and will either shun me or never see me the same again. I can live with that. What I worry about is my parents reviving the same treatment. My parents are awesome (albeit a little strict at times) and don't deserve that!!! But I want them to know who I really am and not this person I pretend to be when they are around. So I am torn between telling them and never telling them about who I really am. I don't know what to do either way...:tears:
:smilewave Welcome to EC! It is a struggle trying to decide if and when you should come out. If your mom and dad can handle it you may only want to tell them and no other relatives. YOu don't want you mom and dad to have to deal with that. How often do you see the rest of your clan. It would be worth if it will save mom and dad. Hugs and good luck sweetie
I am having a similar experience except that I'm a bi-guy turning gay and have to come out to my fiance. So, believe me hat I know what you are talking about but in my case it's easier because she suspects that I'm already gay! Anyways, I had another experience recently with estranged Texas family of eighteen years that I came out to them and they said "You are still either way my family member" but ironically associates/friends had harder times than my family to cope with it. I hope all of the best with your coming out experience with your parents! You seem to have realistic expectations just realize that their immediate reaction might not be their final judgement call. Do you know what I mean? Perhaps bringing around your lover eventually could change their minds or provide some literature on lgtb people on biology, history, sociology, psychology, etc to prove that its perfectly normal to be gay or whatever. I don't know all of yourcircumstances on the motivation of ignorance or experiences of your family so can't say how I'd tackle it. Good luck and hugs, Peter former Texan
Thank you for the welcome I see my clan often since almost 50% transplanted here with us. That's why it makes me nervous to tell them. I may indeed just tell my parents but not for a while. I still don't quite have the spine to tell them...yet. ---------- Post added 25th Jan 2013 at 06:30 AM ---------- Hi! Sorry its just a lame hi but I just went brain dead XD:smilewave ---------- Post added 25th Jan 2013 at 06:33 AM ---------- Ooooh!! Georgia I have never been there! What's it like there? ---------- Post added 25th Jan 2013 at 06:43 AM ---------- Thank you Peter(*hug*)!! I will look into you advise and see what I may do. Former Texan ey. Did you grow up in Texas or were you a transplant like me?
Hi, and welcome to EC! You and I share the same problem. My mother is against being homosexual/bisexual. I have not told her, and I probably never will tell her out of fear of disappointing her and having her never look at me the same. In your case, it may be easier for you to tell your parents that you're bisexual because that lets them know that you still like guys. Yogabear has some wonderful ideas. @Yogabear, So you live in Birmingham, eh? I grew up there. I live about 30 minutes away now. It's still the major city in my area.
This more than likely a good idea. You don't want to have your mom and dad go through anything. best of luck
Hello:smilewave England ey! Never been there, I've mostly just traveled around North Ameria. ---------- Post added 25th Jan 2013 at 05:53 PM ---------- Thanks(*hug*) I'm gonna need it... ---------- Post added 25th Jan 2013 at 05:55 PM ---------- Yah. But it's building up the courage to TELL them that I just can't find right now. I want to tell them but maybe it's just not time yet... I still have somethings I want to accomplish before I tell them.
No, I grew up in northern Tesas but also lived for a time in the western part of the state as well! I did live in New Mexico and Nevada for a time as well even in the mountains too! I hope that one day that I can live in the mountains that will enable me to snuggle up with my stuffed animals and snuggle!
Sorry about the typos on my replies and subsequent messages. If only I knew where to edit my posts that would be great! Yes, I live in this city but not for long though fortunately! Maybe in the near future I'll move back west where people and ideas aren't as entrenched in tradition as much. We can always hope for Washington state cause they have gay marriage!
Cecil! Welcome to EC I think that coming out to your parents is the first step. I wouldn't go into your Pansexuality with them until much later, but I would talk to them about your bisexuality. Maybe leave your grandparents out of it until your parents are comfortable and can give you their honest opinions on how to talk to the rest of your family about it I miss living in Birmingham it was a lot of fun ): ---------- Post added 26th Jan 2013 at 06:02 AM ---------- Ok reading through this I'm confused... Are we welcoming Yogabear or Cecil? lol In order to keep a safe bet WELCOME EVERYONE because I am fucking confused hahaha
My vote is her, me, you and then all of us. I think this is what happens with like minded people that organizations justt break down till we all adapt to one another. Glad that you enjoyed Birmingham, Al just isn't my cup of tea at all.
I miss mountains here!! I use to go to Big Bear Mountain in California all the time with my Dad. Good memories. ---------- Post added 26th Jan 2013 at 12:44 PM ---------- Haha, best way to be safe!
