My name is Some1fromAtl. Dont feel comfortable putting my name out, hope you understand. I am just trying to figure myself out and finally move on with my life. I would like to tell you my story, maybe on another thread. I just really like some help, being I have no one to talk to bout this story and etc.
I would happily share my story. Here or another thread? ---------- Post added 21st Feb 2013 at 07:36 PM ---------- Also it is nice to meet you nikom87 and BubbleGumNinja.
If it's a coming out story, then in the coming out stories section. Otherwise, I have no idea. Welcome!
Not a coming out story but a story of why im questioning my sexuality. I guess a story that spark it all. ---------- Post added 21st Feb 2013 at 07:47 PM ---------- Hello Ticklish Fish, veganarchism, and Minx
Hi some1 hello and welcome! I have found a lot of comfort and support from everyone on this site. I look forward to hearing your story. Take care. :smilewave
This story isnt special. oh this is going to be boring. lol So four years ago, I was a senior in high school. I was a loner throughout high school going through depression and feeling isolated. Though I was on the basketball team, my love for the game wasnt there anymore. My mind was always on things that were deep. I did lot of thinking back then,still do, because whenever I speak, people couldnt understand me. Felt no need trying to talk if people cant understand you. That was my mentality. Plus the things I enjoyed, I felt my surroundings and community wouldnt understand it. Plus there others things but I want to get the point. So, I was always an outcast. So ideas of friendship and romantic relationship I threw out the window. That changed in my senior year. So it was the first day of school, I went to class and took my seat. There were two chairs left and one was next to me. A girl and boy entered. The boy sat next me because he had no choice. My initial reaction was " why did have to seat here", knowing he was "different". Quickly I changed my mentality cause I refused to be like the others who judge and insult others and knew that my initial reaction was because I was thinking on how others see him. He didnt say much in that class and when he did, I would listen closely to his words. I felt I saw a bit of me in him. I had wanted to be friends with him. Then that feeling of wanting to be friends gradually change to potential love. I couldnt believe it. After believing i cant feel love, here suddenly a boy got me feeling these strong feelings. They were purely emotional. And it was shocking because I knew I was attracted to females. I just felt valueless to them. lol So I was heavily draw to this boy. He gave me a reason to go to school, only hoping to see him. When classes are over with, I be on the look out and searching for him but just from the distant. I was obsess. I wont lie One day I slip up. In the class we had together, He had his head down on the desk sleeping. I was looking at him. This was my opportunity to see this beautiful person sleep softly. As I looked at him, oblivious to the world, he suddenly opened his eye while glazing directly at me. He knew. I fallen for his trap, I guess. lol. I quickly turn my head. Man, why he had to do something like that. I wasnt ready. lol Nothing happen though. I would just look from the distant. I graduate and never saw the boy ever again. except, when I was driving with my mom and saw him walking by himself. I gave out a laugh that was full of pain. I regret that with all my heart. It been years sometimes I still cry. I try to forget but it so hard. My greatest joy became my greatest pain. Now I have neighbors who are also "different". A good bit of them here too. They move over here a few months ago. Part of me wish they knew and help me out. But who want to be that person? I feel like I will be burden on them. Plus they may think im crazy and a person with issues. But i'm a person with issues. lol That want to solve them. See I have no one to go to with this. Part of me feel that I will be rejected by the lgbt community though I wish to explore. Seem that mostly everyone knew they were "different" either as kids and early teens. I wish I knew earlier, if i am. Probably could have done something with that boy cause it wouldnt be new. I feel like im wasting my life. I want advice. Cause I clearly dont know what to do. I will happily answer any question. sorry if the story seem too long. ---------- Post added 22nd Feb 2013 at 05:54 PM ---------- Also hello wilted, Sola, thecat06, VyreRain, Cthulhu, and ChandlerCurious
I saw support and advice. go to http://emptyclosets.com/forum/support-advice/85047-sexuality-spark.html#post1372500
