If my intro is too long I apologize... I'm known for being long winded. I realized I was gay back in the early 90's when I was working at a summer camp the summers between high school and I crushed hard on one of my co-workers. I think I first came out the next summer to one of the other staff and I did come out to some of my High School friends but really started the process of coming out in College. All of my friends knew back then. I wasn't the best student though and basically flunked out my junior year. A year later I was living near the college and got into a long distance relationship with my current partner (15 years in April). I've decided I'm going to call him Fang... because I'm just old enough at 36 to appreciate the Phyllis Diller reference... and because it makes me giggle... just a little When Fang and I decided to move in together I emailed my dad (my mom had passed away when I was young) and told him "I'm gay and I'm moving to live with my boyfriend in Pittsburgh". His response was "Need boxes?" I can't imagine it was easy for him but my family has been very supportive (my grandmother always asks about "my friend" but I think that's generational). Except at certain work places where I just didn't say anything (I've never lied to appear straight) I've always been out since college. The problem I have, and why I've sought out someplace "safe", is that I've always been very shy. So while it may seem from the above that I've had it easy I've never been comfortable with myself. I'm absolutely fine with large groups of people (theater, presentations, etc) and small groups of "safe" people (my friends) but strangers one on one or groups of mostly strangers (parties, bars, clubs, etc) are VERY hard for me. So my circle of friends is VERY small and now Fang and I run a business from the house so we don't get out much. In other words, everyone that I could ask for support... I'm either embarrassed to ask or I would rather they don't know or is "part of the problem". For example, if Fang and I get into a fight about sex... I can't ask on Facebook because I'd rather my family not know about my sex life and I don't want my friends to get back to him that I was airing our dirty laundry and I can't ask Fang directly since that's the person I want a "second opinion" on... So that's me in a nutshell. Ptri
