Advice is what we ask for when we wish we didn't already know the answer

Hi All

By way of introduction I guess I'll share my tale of woe. I am a twice divorced mum of two boys, who after a year in a same sex relationship, and the subsequent traumatic ending of said relationship, have finally faced her truth and who can now say, with a sigh of relief, that I am Gay. I. Am. Gay!

The irony of this is that it cost me my relationship to be able to say this. During my time with The Divine Ms. E., and for reasons I am still trying to comprehend, I simply could not, or would not let go of the idea that I was straight. Only to find that every single thing I clung to, and which made perfect sense at the time, felt like one gigantic lie the moment it dawned on me that I had actually, finally, lost her. I had systematically destroyed the most beautiful and meaningful thing that had ever come across my path, and in the process I have hurt beyond repair, the one person that I could truly say, for the first time in my life, that I loved.

So now I am left to cope with my grief, and with the daunting task of figuring out: What the hell next? Where to from here?

I have no idea, but like she keeps telling me...It is what it is. Anyhoo...now that I have you all gnawing your wrists, I guess all that is left is to say...where's the coffee?