Yes, please don't laugh at me. First of all, I'm a closet gay. No one knows except my grandma. I act and look very straight(that's what i'm trying to do). So I think that's something that stops me from meeting a potential boyfriend. The constant fear of being out hinders me from dating. I do have a lot of crushes, but I'm afraid to approach them. So most of the time, i resort to online dating,Which I'm not that successful at. I'm not desperate for a relationship but I wanna experience it really. I wanna love and be loved. To feel pain and experience it.SIGH. I don't wanna be single forever you know. Any tips? advices? (I'm not planning on coming out yet)
Well.... me too to be honest. Personally, if I ever get a boyfriend, I don't want him to know I'm gay until I tell him that I like him. I also don't want to come out and have people see me as gay. I find it hard to be attracted to really flamboyant open gays xD Idk... All I can suggest it to try and meet as many people as you possibly can But what would I know...
No reason to laugh...I'm eight years older than you and no further along. Actually, even less so since you're at least out to your grandmother. I think dating is very difficult for both you and any potential boyfriends if you're in the closet, but I don't think you should sweat that you haven't been in a relationship yet. You still have tons of time.
Same here. I just think it is much more challenging being in the closet and finding a boyfriend at the same time (which I'm sure you know). Like whiteshadows said, your best bet would to try and meet as many people as you can. Just get involved in whatever you can that you're interested in and you're probably going to meet people like you and that are possibly interested in you as well.
Yeah, me too. But I think it is more of the fear of rejection and misunderstanding between my family and I, so there, even if I really push it, I am always setting back off.
I'm 37, never been in a relationship. I win! Where do I claim my prize? Seriously, if you are making the conscious effort to try to find someone, then it will eventually happen. If I've never had a boyfriend is because I didn't try hard enough; I honestly believed that one day someone would come and knock on my door... absolute malarkey. That's not how things work.
How come so many people have this problem? Well, you guys can check my thread and check by yourselves that my situation is like REALLY THE SAME (http://emptyclosets.com/forum/famil...not-so-well-planned-but-still-valid-work.html) My progress is: I found a gay guy on my college! I'm trying to best friend him and it's been a very tough fight because of the comming out issue. I don't plan EVER on comming out. I actually don't have time right now to update my status there, but I'll do it tomorrow. To be short, I'll come out to one of crushes in the next few weeks, it's a matter of time. If he as a gay guy doesn't like me, at least I'll have a very close gay friend to talk about everything that comes to my heart. That is something I missed A LOT. About the comming out issue, I win. NOBODY IN THE WORLD KNOWS I'M GAY, except for people here at the EC board ^^
Hey, no worries. I am sure it will all work out for you. I have never had more than a crush and I am sure he did not return the feelings or even know about mine. Once you feel comfortable coming out, I am sure it will be much easier to meet people for a relationship. As for online dating, I have no idea what you can really do for that because I didn't even do straight online dating. You have plenty of time to figure things out.
Well I'd just like to know if applications are still being accepted into the 'never had a boyfriend' club? I'm really interested in joining xD
I went with the closet boyfriend route at your age and it was great while it lasted, then it was incredibly disastrous when I was forced out prematurely to my homophobic parents. of course not everyone will go through that, thank God. but, you would be doing a great credit to yourself if you first got comfortable with losing the closet. you don't necessarily have to be out to get a boyfriend, but at least knowing you are prepared to be out goes a long was to reducing your anxiety and making it easier to connect with someone, whether its friendship, a hookup or a relationship.
Dude your 19 just chill. Soon enough your man will come along and u won't have to worry about nothin.
I don't want this thread to die, cause it's very helpful. Honestly? This is the biggest problem everyone here has... That's why it's called EMPTY CLOSETS, cause it's intended to get people out from closet with safety. The first step is to feel confortable with that and the relationship subject is the real core of all this. How to start a relationship or to make a good impression with gay people if you are still closeted?
same here, 21 and never had bf... i feel so lonely but what can i do lol... you just keep waiting for the right person!
In this very section there is some great advice given in the resources part of the forum: This is one of the best: http://emptyclosets.com/forum/famil...king-relationship-simpler-than-you-think.html Take the time to read the whole thing, it is very enlightening!
