Hey, y'all! It's been a while since I was really active on here... Basically, I tried explaining that I'm male to my parents. Again. For probably the fifth time. And I got scolded. Again. And now they regulate my every sartorial choice - I'm allowed to keep my short hair, but I have to wear earrings and pretty shirts and dresses more often. I have to try to be a GIRL. And the funny thing is, for about two weeks, I was kind of okay with it. I didn't mind dress shopping, I was okay with makeup, I tried to get used to calling myself a lesbian. Then... a few people "mistook" me for a boy, and I was. Over. The. Moon. I felt FANTASTIC. And... I don't get the feeling that many cisgender girls are that happy to be called male. Those two weeks are what bug me. Sometimes, mostly just for 48-hour periods, I'll be like "Screw it, being a girl would be so much easier than going through transition, which costs money and could alienate family members and friends..." But then, a short while later, I'll start feeling horribly depressed about my female body, and go back to identifying as male - those periods last for much longer. I also am never totally pleased with my female body. I either hate it, or try to be indifferent to it. So I'm pretty sure I'm not nonbinary... I think I'm a guy. Not allowing me to present as male, ever, is driving me UP THE WALL. Sorry for the rant. Can anyone else relate to this?
Luckily, my wardrobe was already gender neutral by the time I came out to my mom. How about trying to compromise with them? Try to convince them to let you buy unisex clothing? What exactly are your parents reactions when you try to tell them you're male?
Ahahaha well, they tell me to stop focusing on useless stuff and there's only so much they can do to get my mind off this kinda stuff... that, ahem, trans* people are "sad"... That I should love my healthy female body, because I'm just so PRETTY... They're okay with me being a "lesbian"... And I do have a fairly neutral wardrobe. It's just that they won't LET me wear purely neutral outfits, because I actually do have a vaguely masculine physical appearance, and they hate it when I get "mistaken" for male.
They don't sound like they understand what you're actually experiencing very well...Have you tried printing out some information about trans* youth to give them, maybe? And I can totally sympathize with you on that part. It hurts a lot whenever my mom "corrects" someone when they call me a boy. Just try to be patient with them, keep strong and insist on your identity, if you continue to feel this way. Eventually they'll have to accept it. If not then, well, the day will come when you're an adult and have control over your own life. Just hang in there, buddy. (*hug*)
Thanks! Your comment made me smile :icon_bigg They've supposedly read about this stuff, but... I don't know WHAT exactly they've read (they won't tell me). If I try to give them any info now... They won't be happy. Can any psychiatrist diagnose someone with GD? They might listen to my psychiatrist if SHE said that...
My cousin knows, and she's supportive… but I mean, if I ever want a binder/therapy, I have to convince my parents… and it looks like that's not happening :dry:
Have you looked here: http://emptyclosets.com/forum/gender-identity-expression/156085-i-just-im-kind-scared.html#4 The first pdf is for the british NHS... a reputable source...
