As a devout catholic..well as devout as a teenage catholic can be..I've struggled quite a bit with accepting myself. It's been easier since I came out to someone who supports me, but I fear that my family will be much less accepting. On the other hand, I feel like they know. I feel like whenever I am ready to tell them, they'll just say "yeah, we know" I feel this way about my friends too, I know most of them will be accepting but one or two are extremely homophobic and I'm having a hard time accepting the fact that I may have to break off those friendships. Being catholic and gay is hard though. There's so much discrimination. Yeah, there are a lot of accepting people (my church is so accepting, I'm lucky), but some are not even close to accepting and that sucks. This definitely is not going to make me turn away from my faith but it's shaking it. Accepting myself as a young, catholic who is gay will take some time, but it's getting easier. Advice would be greatly appreciated, though
Being gay and christian is really hard. It's good your church is so accepting. Also, about your friends, you never know how people will react, some people you think will be accepting won't be, and some people who you think are homophobes might be really nice.
Well its up to you what you say, and when... You might have a look at this, and see what might be of interest for you (and replace the wine with fruit juice ): http://emptyclosets.com/forum/famil...mily-acts-like-my-partner-doesnt-exist.html#8 I'd say take the time you need... and some people come out in a letter... there are letters on EC... hugs
it's a tough situation, but it can be done. it's all about being true to who you are, in all aspects of life. yes, you will find people in the church who hate everyone who is gay; and by the same token, you will find people in the LGBTQ community who hate anything and anybody connected to church, and the catholic church seems to be their favorite target. but the bottom line is that hate is hate. don't focus on the small number who are haters. instead, focus on the greater number of loving people, and be who you are.
God loves all his children. He created all of us out of his image. He wants us to be compassionate and caring and helping each other. People misunderstand the bible. God teaches us to LOVE.
Wen you tell your family, make sure you are absolutely ready and completely safe. Although you think they know, they might not and it could be shocking and difficult for them to accept. Make sure your support system is informed on when to tell your parents, because the only thing harder than coming out to family is doing it alone. It's taken years for me to tell only a few people, but for someone else accepting themselves and completely coming out might happen all in a month. You'll be comfortable and you'll know when the time is right. Religion is also such a touchy subject for many people, but it will either hurt or help your situation. Depending on your friends and families lifestyle they could embrace or disown you, which is scary. Coming out always is. I wish you the best of luck!
I grew up gay in the Missouri Synod Lutheran church, which was a painful experience to say the least. I loved my tradition and faith, but I was also raised with much guilt and shame about my identity and orientation. I came out to my pastor when I was 16 looking for help (I was close to suicidal) but he sent me to a Christian "therapist" who offered conversian therapy, which did far more harm than good. When I turned 18 i shunned all religion and went out to find myself. Eventually I wound up playing for masses at a Catholic Church and (since the liturgy is very similar to Lutheran liturgy, we stole it from y'all after all) I realized that while the church had hurt me when I was young, I missed the community and the sacraments. So I found an ELCA Lutheran church that was affirming of openly gay members and joined. Being able to find a religious community that supported me and still had familiar elements of the religious tradition I grew up in helped me heal from some of those wounds I suffered when I was younger. I found out later that several teachers at the private Lutheran (again, Missouri Synod) school I went to were very supportive and affirming of gay youth. I wish I could go back in time and tell young me to come out to them instead of to the pastor. I wonder how much heart ache I could have spared myself if I had? I've come to learn that it's very important to have older mentors who build you up, and accept who you are exactly as you are. Once I found that, it was much easier to shake off the crippling shame and guilt that all the other "trusted" adults had shackled me with growing up. So if your faith is important to you, I hope you are able to find a worshiping community that accepts you exactly as you are (there are some Catholic Churches out there that do! And if that fails try the Episcopalians or ELCA Lutherans) but more importantly I hope you find someone you can trust to come out to, who will give you good advise and help encourage you and build you up.
when religious people give u hell hit them with this thought i thought a while.back when i was ki da going thru a similar sit: god in the catholic sense well his son 'jesus' is supposted to be benevolent right..that nobody in the world can love as much as he does..so much so that he dies for us..if this statement sounds true to those religious people well heres my take: how can it be that i could possibly love more than god?? becuz i dont know u or anybody else but i love u guys regardless of ur sexuality..id judge u on ur actions torwards others your morals and they way u live not on who u choose to give ur mind heart and body to...i cant see why that would be a reason to hate anybody..love is love whether man and woman woman and woman or man and man..were all human and we feel what we feel most times were not even in control of that..i wish i didnt crush on people i cant have but i cant help it..see what i mean..and i didnt creAte myself so theres no way anybody can judge me negativly without judging the maker..even if i didnt believe that i was born gay but rather that my experiences led me to be gay it still rings true cuz i do believe everything happens for a reason and if that is true than there was a reason why i went thru those experinces and therefore still not a choice of mine..
