I have recently come out to 3 friends and my husband. One of the friends I was very close to and fell for but she didn't know how I felt. She turned out to be Bi and is now in a relationship. A few months a go my husband guessed my feelings for her and I had to tell him about what I now believe my sexuality is. When my friend realised I was having problems in my marriage she cut me out of her life. She won't talk to me at all now which is hard as I see her on a daily basis. My husband was very supportive at first but now he doesn't know what he wants and has been horrible over Christmas. I know he is angry with me but we had problems before all this which is why I ended up spending so much time with my friend. I am now in a situation where I am seeing a councillor, missing my friend desperately and not sure if I can keep going in this marriage. To add to the complication I have 2 children to think about. Very confused and scared. :icon_sad:
Hello and welcome to EC! (*hug*) Oh I see that you are really having hard times breaking up from the save haven of your marriage and loosing your good friend/ crush at the same time. Your husband probably is going through the stages of grief. (denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance according to Elisabeth Kübler Ross) I have been there where you are now, married to a man with two small children, you can find my story here. What really helped my husband and me was that we talked to each other a lot, nothing that came easy to us, it actually was hard work. It is gonna going to be better, I promise, just give it some time! Seeing a counselor for advice is a good move, I think. Please feel free to ask me if you have a question, hugs!(&&&)
Don't really know how I could advise you as I have never been in your position/situation. All I can say is well done for making the move to come out to your friends, and your husband, in my eyes the hardest part is accepting it yourself and telling people close to you. You really need to talk things through with your husband, talk about how you both feel in the new situation and how it's going to be different now(if that's what you want). With regards to your children I can't imagine that either you or your husband will love them any less now you've come out. I know it's going to be hard, but just make sure your happy in everything you decide to do, it will all work out in the end. Good luck with a BIG hug xxx
